The Trials We Face
by GalahadsGurl
Summary: This is BEFORE Season Two begins. Ryan comes home from Chino and comes smacking into some major problems. I hope you like this.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own this. If you recognize this, I didn't create it.

Prologue: Ryan Comes Home

Ryan Atwood had come back home. He looked up at the front of the Cohen home and hitched his bag up higher onto his shoulder. Taking a deep breathe, he reached up and knocked on the door. The door started to creak open and Ryan gave a small smile at the sight of a pale and drawn Kirsten. "Hey Kirsten."

"Ryan?" she asked, tears coming unbidden from her eyes. "Oh my God, this is another dream. I'm going to reach to touch you and you're going to dissipate, just like you always do." She said, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

Ryan remained silent, allowing her hand to make contact. Kirsten's hand collided and then squeezed tightly around the flesh. "You're real." She said, still sounding as though the thought hadn't completely sunk in yet.

Ryan nodded, tears starting to leak from his own eyes. "Yeah, I'm real."

"Oh my son, my baby boy." She sobbed, stepping forward and enfolding him in her arms.

Accepting the embrace, he wrapped his arms around the only real mother he'd ever known and allowed his emotions to take over for the first time since he was a child. The two cried for a long time, both content to just let the tears come. Sandy, Kirsten's husband, came to the door to see what the problem was and smiled at the sight in front of him. "Ryan?"

Ryan disentangled himself from Kirsten, keeping one arm around her waist in order to stay close to her. "Hey Sandy." He said, remembering what Sandy had said the day he'd left.

Sandy smiled at the blond boy who's hair glistens in the sunlight just like Kirsten's. "It's good to have you back, Ryan."

Ryan nods, before Sandy steps forward, pulling him into his arms. The three just stand together, holding each other. Ryan pulls away and notices that his brother, Seth, is missing. "Where's Seth?"

Kirsten's face fell and for a moment, she appeared as though her heart was breaking once again. "He's not here, Ryan. He left the same day you did. He left us a note that said he was going to Tahiti on the Summer's Breeze and he'd be back eventually." Sandy said.

"What?" Ryan asked, thrown by this piece of news. He had expected his brother to be there when he got back, pissed at him, but at least at the house to be pissed.

"I don't know when he's going to be back, Ryan."

"No, he's supposed to be here. He's not supposed to be gone. I have to apologize for leaving." Ryan insisted, looking devastated.

Kirsten understood the boy's distress and reached out, touching his hair gently, secretly pleased when he didn't recoil from the gesture like he usually did. "Come on inside, sweetie. I'm going to assume that you're here for good?"

"I'm back. I'm not leaving again. Theresa's baby belongs to Eddie, not that I really had any doubt. She decided that she couldn't raise a child, or keep me there with her. So she gave the baby up for adoption. And I came home."

Kirsten smiled at the boy she considered a son and then hugged him tighter. "Come on in. I'm sure Marissa will want to hear from you. Tomorrow. However, you're all mine for the rest of the night."

Ryan smiled, nodding in agreement. Following the two into the house, he shut the door on his old life and completely embraced his new one.


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own this. If you recognize this, I didn't create it.

An: Kindly words for my Kindly Reviewers.

Cynthia and J: I hope you like this chapter. There is no Lindsay, or that whole scandal. The Cohens+1 have enough to worry about it as things start to happen later on. And Summer is a little different than OC Summer. I thought that Summer truly loved Seth. She wouldn't just rebound like that if she did. So I embellished on her emotions. By the way, Ryan comes home several months before school begins.

Chapter 1: The Maverick Strays

Ryan moved into the house that night. Kirsten couldn't bear to have him so far away from her. Even if it was the pool house just out the back door. Her oldest child was home and she was in no way having him farther than he needed to be. His new room was next to Seth's room. Although he'd never admit it, he always hoped that one day he'd wake up and find Seth jumping on his bed, trying to wake him up.

It never happened. Seth didn't come home that summer.

Kirsten was inconsolable. Ryan could hear her sobbing in Seth's room after she thought he was asleep. She often stood in the doorway of Ryan's new room, just watching him move about. Her favorite time to watch him was when he was asleep and he looked peaceful and childlike. Ryan didn't mind her hovering, but he couldn't help feeling furious at Seth for ditching out on the people who loved him.

Seth's disappearance didn't just affect Kirsten. Summer was just as inconsolable without her boyfriend. She acknowledged that she hadn't always been nice to him, but after getting to know him and then loosing him, she realized that she loved him more than she'd ever loved anyone.

Ryan and Marissa got back together, both accepting responsibility for their separation. When they were happy once more, they both ganged up on Summer, trying to bring her out of the funk that Seth had put her in. When school started up again in the fall, Ryan had determined that he was going to make new friends. His brother had ditched Newport, and while he could understand why he'd done it, Ryan wasn't going to sit around and wait for the tall, dark and curly haired boy to come back.

Kirsten and Sandy proposed the idea of adopting Ryan about a month before school began. Ryan tried to act nonchalant about it, but he very nearly leaped for joy at the idea, agreeing to it almost immediately. He had nothing to go back for in Chino. Newport was his home now and these people were his family. He wasn't going to just leave again. His records would all read, "Atwood-Cohen," but he'd continue to go by "Ryan Atwood" at school.

The first day of school, a Wednesday, the three were eating lunch on the lawn, talking when five boys approached. They were obviously very good friends. Marissa watched them as they got closer and closer to the trio.

Two were identical. They both wore baggy jeans and long sleeved white shirts. Their blond hair flopped into their eyes, causing both boys to continually brush the strands out of the way. Green eyes sparkled with a youthful sheen. One of the other boys had a head of close cropped black curls, his blue eyes made even bluer by the color of his navy polo shirt over a pair of black surf shorts, navy hibiscus flowers creating the trim on the sides. One of the boys was a redhead, and he wore a black tank top under a white button down over a pair of black cloth shorts. The last boy was a brunette with brown eyes. He wore a bright orange tee shirt with a pair of denim shorts.

"Hi. Do you mind if we join you?" asked one of the twins.

Ryan was leaning back against Marissa, his head resting comfortably in the curve of her shoulder. He tilted his head back, looking for an okay. Marissa looked at Summer, who nodded, and then gestured at the ground around them. "Take a seat. Our lawn is your lawn."

"Thanks," the other twin said, before they all sat down.

"So who are all of you? I don't recognize you. Are you new?" Summer asked, upset by the fact that she didn't know these people yet. She was the queen bee; it was her responsibility to know who these people were.

"Yeah; we're seniors, the whole lot of us," commented the brunette with a thick New York accent.

"Names?" Marissa asked, having been momentarily surprised by the brogue tingeing the words.

"Nathaniel Vaughn, and my twin brother, Benjamin. Aidan Bennett. Matthew Wyatt. And that's Jesse Dagwood. You can call us Nathan, Ben, and Matt."

"I'm Ryan Atwood, my girlfriend Marissa Cooper and our friend Summer Roberts. How do you all know each other?"

Jesse, the black haired one, chuckled, speaking in an accent just as thick as his friend's, "We're brothers."

"Brothers?" came the surprised question from Marissa. "How? You've all got different last names?"

"Mom adopted us, bless her heart." Ben explained, brushing a strand of blond hair out of his ivy green eyes.

"Could you maybe explain from the beginning?" Summer begged, just as confused as Marissa.

"Okay. Our mother, Anka Maverick, is a history, English and government teacher for the Juvenile Hall system. All five of us were students of hers, although some of us didn't deserve it. When we got out, we had nowhere to go. We would have ended up right back in Juvie. So, believing that everyone deserves a second chance, mom took us in." Nathan explained.

"Where are you all from?"

"Well, the twins are from Philadelphia, where Ani taught first. They were 13 when they went in and 15 when they got out. They've been with Ani the longest out of us all, nearly three years. That's why both of them feel comfortable calling her mom.

"Then Ani moved to get away from Ace and Priya's dad and started working at the juvenile hall in NYC. That's where she picked up me, Matt, Aidan and our other brothers, Rohan Montana and Taurean Berkeley. We've been with her anywhere from six months to two years. Aidan is the most recent of the adoptions. Taurean is now 18 and Rohan is almost 19. Ani browbeat both into applying at the community college near here. They still live with us." Jesse elaborated. "Ani's mother calls us the Mavericks Strays. It fits."

"Who are Ace and Priya?"

"Ace and Priya are twins. Ace is a boy and Priya is a girl. Ani was raped and they are the results," clarified the brunette, the one named Matthew.

"Oh." Ryan said, with a slightly taken aback look. "Sorry I asked."

"Not a problem. They're cool and the apples of our eyes."

"So what are you doing here?" Marissa asked.

"New York wasn't paying Ani enough to cover certain expenses. California saw that Ani had a positive turnout rate higher than any of the other teachers in New York. They offered her more money and other incentives if she would come and start work at the Los Angeles County Juvenile Corrections Facility." Aidan explained, his red hair a match for his obvious sass and temper.

"What kind of incentives?"

Ben looked away as Nathan answered, "Some are medical reasons."

Ben added, "I'm diabetic and the dialysis, plus the insulin is expensive, especially on teacher's pay."

"I see." Summer said, before speaking up again. "Chino's been in Juvie."

Ryan rolled his eyes at the persistent, but fond, nickname. Matt stared, before asking, "How are you going to school here?"

"I could ask you the same question." Ryan shot back.

Aidan nodded in response to the implied challenge. "One of the incentives Ani insisted on, was an education at the most elite high school in Cali. Harbor is it, so the State of California is paying for our tuition."

Ryan nodded back, before answering, "I was taken in by my lawyer and his wife. They adopted me, willingly wanted to be my parents. They're paying for my tuition. My dad thinks that Harbor is the best place for me."

"Cool, Ani would be glad to hear that. She's a big sponsor of second chances and the importance of a good education."

"Yeah, Sandy is too."

"Sandy?" asked Jesse, accent thick.

"Yeah, Sandy and Kirsten are my parents. I have an adoptive brother, Seth, but…."

Ryan broke off as Summer burst into tears. "But he's gone," she sobbed hysterically, allowing both Marissa and Ryan to pull her close and comfort her.

"I'm sorry." Ryan apologized, sounding distressed. "I know better than to mention him. Damn it!"

When Summer had calmed down, Ryan turned to the five and asked, "You guys want to come and hang out with me and the girls tonight at my place?"

"Sure. Sounds like fun."

"Awesome. You can meet Sandy and Kirsten. Sandy's from New York. I think you'll like him."

Nathan exchanged glances with his brothers. "I have no doubt."


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own this. If you recognize this, I didn't create it.

An: Kindly words for my Kindly Reviewers.

J: I'm sorry, but we don't see Seth for a long time.

Core: I'm glad you like my Strays. I like them too.

Cynthia: I hope you continue to read this. And continue to enjoy it.

Chapter 2: Meeting the 'Rents

When Ryan met up with Summer and Marissa after school, he saw that the "Maverick Strays," as they insisted on being called, were already there, waiting for him. "Hey, sorry I'm late. I had to wait for the coach to give me the dates for soccer try-outs. I've been guaranteed a spot on the roster, but I need to be there so that I have a say in who gets picked."

"Why do you get say?"

"I'm team captain this year." Ryan said, causing Marissa to squeal and attack him. "That's great! Congratulations, baby!"

"Thank you. So, we all ready to go?"

"Yep. The guys have a truck, so you and Summer and me are going to take my car and then they'll follow us."

"Okay, sounds like a plan. What do you say, Summer?"

"I think it's a good plan. Let's go." She answered, her voice sounding raw and fractured as though she'd spent the afternoon crying.

Ryan took Marissa's hand and both led the way to Marissa's SUV. Ryan leaned down, whispering in his girlfriend's ear, "What happened?"

"Well, the sponsor of the literature-magazine this year came up and asked Summer if she'd seen Seth. The teacher needed to talk to him about this year's layout. Well as I'm sure you can guess, that sent Summer into another fit of tears."

"Seth's an idiot." Ryan muttered under his breath. "I can't believe he just left. I mean, I know he was mad, but he shouldn't have just disappeared. This is killing Sum."

"I know, Ryan. But there's nothing we can do. Either Seth comes back and Summer has a rage-blackout before forgiving him. Or Summer is forced to move on because he doesn't come back."

"This is killing Kirsten too. I started calling her 'Mom' just because Seth isn't around to do it."

Marissa nodded, handing Ryan the keys. "You drive. I'm going to talk to Summer."

"Okay." Ryan said, rounding the hood of the car to the driver's side door.

Marissa watched Summer climb into the car listlessly and then climbed in herself. The black 4Runner filled with the Mavericks waiting patiently behind and to the side of them. Ryan backed out of the parking place and then drove off campus, headed for home, the truck easily keeping pace with him.

When they got home, Ryan unlocked the front door and held it open for the crowd of teenagers behind him. "Hello? Mom?"

"In here, sweetie. How was school?" Kirsten asked as Ryan entered the kitchen.

"It was fine." Ryan said, approaching and kissing her cheek gently.

Kirsten reached behind her, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. Ryan's companions entered the kitchen and Kirsten tilted her head back to look at Ryan. "New friends?"

"Yeah. These are the Maverick Strays. And I'll explain that, later. That's Nathan, his twin Ben, Matt, Aidan and Jesse. Nathan and Ben are from Philly and the other three are from NYC. I thought Sandy would like to meet them."

"Sandy got called into court. He won't be back till tonight. So, either you can cook or I can order in. It's your choice."

"I don't mind take-out."

"Why can't you cook, Mrs. Atwood?"

Ryan winced, but Kirsten only smiled at the term. "My name is Kirsten Cohen. Ryan is actually Ryan Atwood-Cohen. But he won't use the Cohen name at school. Only at home. And, if you want an answer, I'm sure my son can give you one."

Ryan chuckled. "Mom can't boil water. Let alone cook."

"Thank you. I can boil water. I just don't know what to do after the water is boiling."

"That's one of the reasons we love you, Mom."

Kirsten smiled sadly, before standing and kissing her son's forehead. "I'll be in the study. I have some work to do. Keep it down, or go hang out in the pool house."

"We'll be in the pool house. It's got the Playstation and everything." Ryan said, having seen the sadness creeping into his mother's eyes. No matter what he tried, Kirsten's heart broke a little more each second.

"All right. Love you baby."

"Mom!" Ryan protested, playing the part of typical teenager, although he was secretly thrilled by her announcement.

"Oh that's right. Teens don't like having their friends know that their mothers love the ground they walk on. My bad; I forgot. I'll leave you guys alone. The pantry is full, anything you want."

"Thanks Mom." Ryan said, watching her leave the room.

Marissa came to Ryan's side, wrapping an arm around his waist. "Seth has to come back. Our world is tumbling down without him." She whispered, burrowing into Ryan's shirt.

"I know, Rissa. I know." Ryan agreed, kissing her hair gently before turning his attention to his new friends. "Grab whatever you want out of the pantry and then let's head to the pool house."

The eight teens raided the pantry and left the house through the kitchen doors, walking around the pool to the white building that used to be Ryan's home. Ryan pulled his keys out of his pocket and then fitted the correct key into the lock, flipping it around and shoving open the doors. "Welcome to my first room at the Cohen house." Ryan laughed with a flair. "Watch the steps." He said, moving into the roomy suite.

"This was your room?" Nathan asked, looking around. The pool house was equipped with its own kitchen, a bed and a raised living room area, complete with couch, TV, DVD collection as well as Playstation 2, X-Box and Game Cube.

"Yeah. Now I live in the main house, but this is my hideaway when I want to spend the night away from Kirsten and Sandy."

"Cool. So your parents? Tell us about them."

Ryan sat down on the end of the couch, curling into the corner and pulling Marissa into the curve of his body. Marissa leaned against him, her head resting comfortably on his chest. "Well, Kirsten runs the Newport Residence Firm. It's an architectural company; they build the million dollar houses around here. It used to be run by Caleb Nichol…."

Marissa interrupted then, "Caleb is my step-dad and Kirsten's father."

"Doesn't that make Ryan your nephew?" Matt asked, trying to piece together the connections.

"We don't like to dwell on that. We were dating a long time before my mom and Caleb were ever together."

"I see. Why doesn't Caleb Nichol run it anymore?"

"He got into some trouble. And he had to scrap the original corrupt Newport Group and make it into the hundred percent legal, Newport Residence Firm for Kirsten. I work there, although technically, I work for Kirsten. And Kirsten works from home. So, I work from home. But I get to spend time at the houses we're building and talk to Kirsten about all the different aspects of the job. I want to be an architect when I get out of college. Kirsten says she'll hire me."

"Cool. So what about your brother?"

Ryan shook his head. "That's a touchy subject and I don't think any of the three of us want to discuss him."

"Oh. Sorry."

"It's okay. It just hurts to talk about him. He was my first friend in Newport. So, I can't really handle the subject. And Summer dated him, is still dating him. They never broke up before he left."

Summer approached the couch where her two best friends sat. Ryan shifted into the middle of the couch, Marissa lying with her head in his lap on one side and Summer reclined with her head buried in his chest on the other side. Ryan ran his fingers through Marissa's hair, his free arm holding Summer close. He turned his head and kissed Summer's temple. He didn't know when it had happened, but in the one-month time since Summer had rained her fury down on his head in the form of an infamous rage-blackout and by the end of summer, he and his brother's girlfriend had become almost like brother and sister. "You three look close."

"We are close. We're all that we have to remind us of last year, before everything went to hell."

"I see."

"Yeah."

Sandy came home later that night, at almost nine. Kirsten had ordered Chinese for everyone and then had gone to bed early, trying to escape the grief and the emptiness where Seth should have been. Ryan and the rest of the teenagers had retreated to the pool house after dinner, trying to give Kirsten some space to grieve. Sandy came into the kitchen, looking for leftovers and saw that the light was on in the pool house. Grabbing a soda, he went out to send Ryan to bed.

Imagine his surprise when he saw two girls and six boys sitting on the floor, playing "I Have Never". "Ryan?" Sandy questioned. "You have curfew. That includes the pool house."

Ryan swiveled to look at the kitchen clock. "Oops." He said, biting on his lower lip. He wasn't allowed to be in the pool house past nine on school nights. "Sandy, I'd like you to meet my new friends, the Maverick Strays; Nathan, Ben, Matt, Aidan and Jesse. Guys, this is my dad, Sandy."

"How do you do? And we have to head home. Ani'll freak out if we don't show up soon." Jesse replied, standing up and brushing off the seat of his pants.

Marissa and Summer each took one of Ryan's hands and accepted his help to their feet. Sandy eyed Ryan and then nodded. "See them to the door and then get to bed. It's late."

"Yes sir." Ryan said, giving a sharp nod.

When the adoption had taken place and the papers were filed, Kirsten was the only name on them. And that was fine by Ryan and Sandy. Ryan had a real mother, and a father when he needed one. Sandy had a son, when he wasn't in legal trouble. But Kirsten had someone who could help to fill the void left by a Cohen son, 24 hours a day. Sandy leveled an eye at Ryan, mentally telling him to hurry up before turning and leaving the pool house.

Ryan led the way to the front door. Summer went up on tiptoes, giving him a hard hug, before fleeing toward Marissa's car. Ryan punched fists with each of the five boys as each of them filed past on their way out of the house. Then he pulled Marissa close and kissed her passionately. "Look after Summer tonight, okay? I think she needs you."

"All right, Ry. I love you."

Having finally come to terms with his emotions for Marissa, he replied shyly, "I love you, too. Go on, or I'll get grounded. And what a way to start off the school year."

Marissa nodded and smiled, kissing him once more before disappearing into the dark. Ryan stood in the doorway until he heard two cars start up and drive away. Only then, did he shut the door and turn toward the staircase. Sandy was standing there, blocking his path. "How's Summer?"

Ryan switched directions and moved into the living room, sitting down on the couch. "Grieving. She's heartbroken."

"And Marissa?" Sandy questioned, following his son into the room, sitting on the armchair across from the couch.

"Marissa's just fine. Just like always."

"Good to hear. Who are the Maverick Strays?"

"It's a long story. I was going to tell Kirsten tomorrow. Can you wait until then?"

"I guess, if I have to."

"Please. I have to think of a good way to explain them, in detail."

"All right. I'll expect to hear about it in the morning, though. And don't think that you're going to get out of it. Go on upstairs and hit the sack. It's a school night."

"Yes Sandy."

"Good night, kid."

"Good night, Sandy," Ryan yawned, trudging up the stairs to his room.

Kirsten was sitting on his bed, crying. Ryan came to her side and sat down next to her. "What's wrong, Mom?"

"I miss him so much, Ryan. But I don't think that anyone misses him as much as you do. And I'm sorry that I haven't been more sensitive to that."

"No, Mom. Yes, I miss him. He's my brother, my best friend. But I could never miss him as much as you do. He's your son. You will always miss him more than I will. And you've been just fine about everything. I'm not a very emotional person, remember? My emotions are better kept locked up."

Kirsten smiled, understanding that for the truth it was. Ryan had just barely learned control over his emotions. Kirsten leaned and kissed Ryan's head. "I love you baby."

"I love you too, Mom."

"Get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning?"

"And every morning after." Ryan agreed, kissing Kirsten's cheek tenderly.

Kirsten rested her temple against his cheek before kissing his forehead quickly and fleeing from the room.

Ryan sighed and stripped to his boxers. Climbing under the covers, he turned onto his side and promptly fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own this. If you recognize this, I didn't create it.

An: Kindly words for my Kindly Reviewers.

CynthiaB: I know it seems to strange now and I'm sorry. It felt strange when I was writing it. But Seth is gone and suddenly, Ryan is left to fill his shoes. That's a pretty hefty responsibility for a young man who has never had a real family. I hope you like it better as things start to progress through the story.

J: I'm glad you like it.

Summerethryrissa: Welcome to the Party! First of all, I love your penname. It's cool. And secondly, the Strays become a major part in this story. I'm sorry. And I'm glad you like Ryan's relationship getting closer to Kirsten. She just seems like she's the kind of woman who needs to hear her son call her Mom. And since the son who calls her "Mom" is gone, it's up to Ryan to fill those shoes. Pretty heavy stuff, if you ask me. I hope you continue to read this story.

And so without any further babbling from me…..

Chapter 3: Something's Wrong

Anka Maverick was not like any woman that Ryan had ever met. A couple months later, The Strays, as Ryan had taken to calling them collectively, had invited Ryan over for some "guy time". Marissa and Summer wanted to go shopping and Ryan wasn't in the mood to listen about the perks of one color and the recriminations of another.

Nathan had driven Ryan to the Maverick home and pulled into the driveway of a spacious house. It wasn't as big as the Cohen place, but it was big enough for their needs. When Ryan walked in, the first thing he saw was a pair of children sleeping on the floor in front of the TV. They looked to be about three years old, maybe younger. A pretty woman, with waist length black hair and sparkling blue eyes, came into the living room at the same time as the six boys. She was wearing a black tube dress, with a handkerchief hem and pink trim. Her hands were by her ears, slipping on black and pink earrings to match the black, pink and white choker she wore around her neck. Her feet were shod in a pair of high heeled, Roman-style ankle-wrap sandals. She looked like she was all of 25 years old. "Ah, Nathan. You're home. Good. I need you to baby-sit your brother and sister."

"Why me?" Nathan protested.

"It's your turn." The woman explained, finally catching sight of the new boy in her midst. "Hello? I don't think I know you."

"I'm Ryan Atwood. I'm a friend of your sons'."

The woman sucked in a breath with a smile. "So you're Ryan? Nice to meet you. I'm Anka Maverick. You may call me Anka or you can call me Ani, like the rest of the boys."

"All right. Thank you, Miss Anka."

"Oh, it's only Anka. Miss Anka is what my students call me."

"I can't call you that! You're an adult." Ryan protested.

"Please call me Anka. I'm too young to feel so own."

"Yes ma'am." Ryan said, ducking his head to hide his blush.

Anka smiled at him before turning her attention to her sons. "All right. I have a date. Rohan is in his room. He's doing homework, which the five of you will have done before I get home. Taurean is not feeling well, so leave him alone. And Matthew, if you pull a prank on him, you're grounded."

Matthew's previously elated face fell at this warning. "Yes ma'am." He grumbled.

"Good. The kids need to eat, but they'll probably only want Mac and Cheese. There's plenty of it in the pantry. If they don't wake up, please move them into their rooms. I don't want to get home and find them still sleeping on my floor. Is that understood?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Good." She said again, before moving to her children's side.

She bent down, placing a tender kiss to each of their heads. "Love you both, my babies. Momma will see you when she gets back." she murmured, before standing and moving away again. "Okay, I'll see you all tonight. I should be back by 10 o'clock. Eleven at the latest. Bedtime is still at eight for them. And I don't want to find out they talked you into staying up again. If they do, Nathan, it's your head that my wrath will come down upon."

"Yes ma'am."

"Love you all. Kisses hugs." She said, kissing and hugging each boy. Pausing next to Ben, she whispered in his ear. Ben nodded, leaning his cheek into her hand before Anka had to run out the door as a car horn honked.

Ryan looked at Ben, the one he connected with the easiest. "That's your mom?"

"Yep, that's Ani. Pretty cool huh?"

"She's not like any mother I've ever had. My biological mother is a flake and druggie. And Kirsten is well known for her calm, cool and collected exterior, even if she's freaking out on the inside. Although I think Anka channels Kirsten's inner drill sergeant."

"Every mother has an inner drill sergeant. It's how they make us, their own personal juvenile delinquents, do what we're told."

"How true." Ryan said, before following the five into the den. Nathan and Matthew moved into the living room, carefully lifting their brother and sister, and carrying them up the stairs into their room.

The six boys played Playstation all night, finally having to stop at about 10:30 in an attempt to clean up their mess before Anka came home. Around 10:45, Ryan suddenly felt weak, as though his knees could no longer hold him. He swayed and would have fallen if Ben wasn't there to catch him. "Hey, man, you okay?"

Ryan shook his head, squeezing his eyes tightly and opening them wide. "Yeah. I don't know what just happened. All of the sudden, I felt really weird."

"Hmm. Maybe you should tell your mom?" Nathan suggested.

"And give her something else to worry about? Nah, I'll just get some extra sleep tonight. I'm really tired."

"You want us to call your mom for you? You can go lay down in Nathan and Ben's room."

Ryan nodded, shaking his head distractedly again. "Yeah. Thanks."

"Go get some rest, man. You don't look so good."

Ryan nodded and disappeared down the hall, slipping into the twins' room and collapsing onto Ben's bed. Curling up into a fetal position, he closed his eyes and was almost immediately asleep. Nathan picked up the phone and called the Cohen house. It had been months since the six boys had met and the Mavericks were pretty close with Ryan's parents. The phone rang once and Kirsten picked it up, "Ryan?" she asked, sounding worried.

"No, Mrs. Cohen, it's Nathan, Nathan Vaughn. Ryan's here."

"Oh, good. Oh, I forgot he didn't have the car. Do I need to come get him?"

"Yeah, and don't tell him I told you this, but I would keep an eye on him for awhile. He nearly fainted."

"Fainted? Ryan?" Kirsten asked, thinking that the very idea was ludicrous. However, Ryan hadn't been feeling too well lately. Maybe he'd been overdoing it. "Thank you, Nathan. I will keep an eye on him. And I won't tell him you told me. I'll be there soon."

"Thanks." Nathan answered, before hanging up the phone and turning to his brothers.

Ben spoke first. "If Ryan finds out that you did that, he's going to kill us both, just because he can't tell us apart."

Nathan smirked, patting his twin on the back. "Relax, he won't find out unless you tell him."

"I have no intention of doing so." Ben said dryly.

Kirsten got out of the car and then jogged toward the door, just as Anka got out of the car and walked toward her house. "Hello? Can I help you?" Anka asked, pulling her keys from her purse.

"Yeah, I'm here for my son, Ryan. I'm Kirsten Cohen, his mother."

"Hi, I just met Ryan. He's a nice kid. I'm Anka, Anka Maverick. My boys call me Ani."

"Nice to meet you Ani. Could I get my son? It's late and he has school in the morning."

"Sure thing. The same applies to my children too. Come on in. I'll send Ben to get him."

"Thank you." Kirsten said, following the petite sable haired woman into the foyer of her home.

Anka looked into the kitchen and counted heads. "There are only five of you. Where's Ryan?"

"He's sleeping, in the twins' room. He hasn't been feeling too good."

"Why didn't you send him home?"

"He didn't complain about anything. Just later tonight, he complained of feeling weird and tired. He nearly collapsed. He went to lay down and Nathan called Mrs. Cohen. Is she here?"

"Yes, she's in the foyer. She'd like her son."

Ben nodded, "I'll go get him."

"Thank you darling." Anka said, kissing his cheek as he passed.

Ben crept into his room and shook Ryan's shoulder gently. Ryan had been wearing a sweater over a tank top, but had shucked the sweater, wearing only the wife beater. Ben pulled his hand away from Ryan's clammy shoulder, realizing that Ryan was sweating like crazy. He left the room and checked the thermostat really quickly. It was only 65 degrees in the house. Being from the east, 65 degrees was as hot as this particular family could handle. But Ryan had grown up in California; 65 degrees was cold. Ryan shouldn't be sweating that bad. Returning to his friend's side, he shook Ryan's shoulder harder, finally jarring the boy out of his slumber. "Hey, Ry, your mom's here."

"Thanks man." Ryan said, sitting up listlessly and reaching for his sweater. "Uh, my bones ache."

Ben stared at Ryan. The guy had one complaint after another. "Go to a doctor."

"Nah, I'm fine. I probably have a flu bug. It'll go away in a few days."

Ben nodded and followed his new best friend from the room. Kirsten watched her son approach, noticing that he was moving slow and he looked really pale, with tiny red spots across his arms, neck and face. "Honey, are you okay?" she asked, placing a hand on his clammy forehead. "You're sweating like crazy."

"I'm okay. Just tired. And really hot."

"Okay, baby. Let's get you home. The sooner you're in bed, the happier I think I'll be."

Ryan nodded, leaning against his mother as she wrapped an arm around her son's waist. "Nice to meet you Anka. I hope we can get together again."

"Count on it. How about the day after tomorrow, we go get lunch?"

"Sounds like a plan. I look forward to it. Gratzie's?"

"Done. Say noon?"

"Perfect. See you then."

Anka nodded, waving at the two as they walked slowly toward the Range Rover in the driveway. Kirsten opened the door for Ryan, watching him climb in and lean his head back against the head rest. "How you feeling?"

"I'll be okay. Can we go home?"

"Anything you want baby. Let's go home."


	5. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: Kindly Words for my Kindly Reviewers.

AgnesSophia: I'm glad you like it. Today, we get an inkling about what's wrong with Ryan. I hope you like this. And I don't mind.

Elebridth: I'm sorry you don't like Marissa and Ryan together. And you'll have to wait and see.

Carebear Stare: I hadn't even realized that I had used Alias and Charmed for the names until you mentioned it. But it makes sense, because those are some of my favorite TV shows. I hope you continue to read this.

J: I'm sorry it's strange to you. I hope you grow to like their relationship as the story progresses. And thank you, I thought that Ryan should have a real mother and Kirsten needs a son.

CynthiaB: I'm glad you like their connection. Anka is the only real person in Newport. So they soon become best friends, because Anka doesn't judge at all and she's sincere about her feelings.

Barbara: I apologize for my mistake. I'm sure you've never made any yourself.

Raindrops falling: Not quite. It's more serious than that. Keep reading and you'll find out soon.

Chapter 4: A Testing Day

Ryan woke up one morning almost a week later, aching in every joint in his body and with a headache to end all headaches. Shuffling to his bathroom, he turned on the water as hot as it would go and then downed at least five Tylenols. Stripping slowly, he stepped under the hot water, wincing at the heat. Turning his back to the rush of water, he allowed the pounding water to release the tension in his body. He stood there for nearly ten minutes, before nausea caught him broadside and he lunged at the toilet, bringing up last night's dinner and the Tylenol before starting to painfully dry heave.

He groaned, one hand reaching blindly to turn off the water. "Damn." He muttered, hauling himself to a standing position again and taking several more pills to replace the ones he'd just thrown up. He wrapped a towel around his waist and then eased his way back into his room. His movements were slow and sluggish as he dressed for school.

Coming downstairs, his stomach revolted at the smell of coffee, usually his favorite early morning smell. Kirsten smiled at him, gesturing at the pot. "You want some?"

"No thanks. I can't even stand the smell of it."

"What's wrong?" she asked, coming to place a hand on his forehead. "You don't have a fever. Does anything hurt?"

"I have a headache, and my knees are killing me. But I'm fine. I'm just nauseous."

"Are you sure you should be going to school?"

"I'll make you a deal. If I get sick, I'll go to the nurse's office and you can take me home. However, if not, I'm fine. Okay?"

Kirsten looked skeptical, but knew that that was the best she was going to get out of her son. "Okay. But I want to know if you feel bad at all."

"Yes Momma."

Kirsten smiled as a car horn honked. "That would be Marissa and Summer I imagine. Be good. Get good grades." She teased. Her oldest was well on his way to being valedictorian, with his grades.

Ryan smiled, showing a little bit of his usual charm before he dashed for the door. Kirsten watched him kiss Marissa through the window and then climb into the backseat of the SUV. She waved after them as the car pulled out, and two of the three waved back. Marissa, she knew, drove with both hands on the wheel.

Ryan felt dreadful all day, barely managing a few of Marissa's French fries for lunch. Whenever anyone asked him if he was okay, he just shrugged and answered in his usual way, "I'm fine."

Marissa didn't believe him; however, she had no choice but to leave it alone. The red spots on his neck were spreading and Marissa was worried her boyfriend had developed a rash. After lunch, Ryan and the Strays split ways with the girls. Marissa and Ryan exchanged a brief peck before the six boys headed down the hall toward their shared gym class. He paused, suddenly confused. He stopped for a moment to take in his surroundings, looking like he didn't know where he was. Ben stopped alongside, looking at him with concern. "Hey, Ry! You okay?"

Ryan looked around for a moment, looking for something familiar almost frantically. Then, all of the sudden, his eyes rolled back into his head and he started convulsing on the linoleum floor. Ben had managed to catch his head before it could slam into the floor and now the taller boy pulled the compact, young athlete into his arms to try to make sure he didn't hurt himself. Almost as suddenly as the seizure began, it stopped. "Ry? Ryan! Come on man, wake up."

Ryan didn't stir, not even an eyelash fluttered. Ben looked up at his brothers, looking very worried. "Someone had better go and get the nurse."

Nathan nodded and added on, "And someone had better get the girls as well."

"Yeah, Marissa and Summer will want to be here."

Ben nodded and watched as Aidan ran in the direction of the nurse's office and Jesse & Matt went to get the girls from Calculus and English, respectively. Nathan crouched next to Ben, who still held Ryan in his arms. The two lifted the unconscious teen and pulled him to slouch against the wall. About five minutes later, Marissa and Summer converged on Ryan from opposite directions. "Ry!" shouted a distraught Marissa, dropping to her knees beside her boyfriend. "Ryan, baby, wake up." She whispered, stroking his hair back from his face gently.

Ryan moaned, but otherwise did nothing else. Marissa sat next to him against the wall and pulled his body into her own. Summer knelt at his other side, holding his hand tightly in her own.

By the time the nurse arrived, the bell for next period had rung and only the seven teens remained in the hall, surrounding the one they called brother, lover, friend…the heart of their group. "Move! Let me through!" she ordered, pushing the boys apart.

Dropping to her knees, she passed sniffing salts under Ryan's nose. Ryan jerked with a moan and then shifted slightly, his eyes fluttering open. "What happened?" Ryan asked in a whisper.

"You had some kind of seizure and then you passed out." Aidan explained gently.

The nurse gestured for the twins to lift the disoriented teenager off the hallway floor. "I'll call your mother, Mr. Atwood. She can come and pick you up. You probably need to see a doctor."

Ryan nodded, swaying against Nathan unsteadily. Nathan and Ben exchanged a look over Ryan's head and each pulled one of his arms over their shoulders. "Come on man. Let's get you out of here."

Ryan nodded again, too tired to do anything else, and walked listlessly between his friends. Aidan and Jesse volunteered to walk the girls back to class. Summer shook her head, before dashing down the hall in tears. Ryan, her protective older brother, was sick and she didn't know what she could do to help. It was frustrating for her; he was one of the only people still there for her. Marissa just gave the two a teary and sad smile before racing off after her. The three remaining boys lifted their gym bags and continued on to class.

Kirsten was at her desk, listening to her assistant prattle on about something or another. All she knew? It didn't have to do with architecture. When her phone rang, she waved impatiently, gesturing the woman to silence. "Hello, Kirsten Cohen, Newport Residence Firm."

"Hello? Mrs. Cohen, this is Nurse Barker at Harbor High. Your son, Ryan, had a seizure this afternoon after lunch. He's currently lying down in my office, trying valiantly to stay awake. I would recommend a doctor almost immediately after you come and get him."

Kirsten had heard the words, "Ryan had a seizure," and that was about it. Everything else was inconsequential. "I'm on my way. Tell my son, I'm on my way."

"I will do so, ma'am."

Kirsten hung up the phone and collected her things. "Clear my schedule for the day. I have family stuff to take care of. And I need you to call my doctor and set up an appointment for today, ASAP."

"Yes ma'am." The flustered intern stuttered.

Kirsten ran from the office, heading at break-neck speed for her car. All the while, a feeling of dread hung to her heart.

Ryan was asleep on the cot in the nurse's office, when Kirsten arrived at the high school. She dashed into the nurse's office and dropped to her knees beside her slumbering child. "Ry? Honey, it's Mom. Wake up baby."

Ryan shivered with chills and strained to open his baby blue eyes. Kirsten caressed his face and head gently as he forced open his eyes. When at last his eyes focused on her, he gave a tired smile. "Mommy," he murmured, holding out his arms like an exhausted little boy.

Kirsten pulled him up and into her arms, stroking his hair as she spoke. "Hi Baby. Mommy heard you weren't feeling too good." She murmured, amazed that this drowsy and trusting boy was actually her stoic and wary Ryan.

"Nuh-uh. Everything hurts."

"I'll bet it does, my darling." Kirsten soothed, holding her son close to her heart. "Come on love. Let's get you out of here."

She tossed Ryan's backpack over her shoulder and helped the nurse transfer the boy from the bed to the wheelchair. The nurse pushed the chair toward Kirsten's car as the frightened mother held her remaining son's hand. Ryan moved slowly into the backseat, crawling across the seats and plopping down exhausted. Kirsten pulled a blanket from the trunk space and tucked it around the shivering figure. "Love you baby."

"Love you back," he whispered, closing his eyes and falling quickly to sleep.

Kirsten kissed his temple and backed out of the seat. She closed the door of the Rover and climbed into the driver's seat. She had hoped to thank the nurse for her help; however, the woman was already gone.

Arriving at the doctor's office, Kirsten helped an unsteady and blanket-wrapped Ryan into the sterile and pristine room. "Hi, is Dr. Roberson in?"

"Yes; can I ask if you have an appointment?"

"I honestly don't know if I do. Kirsten Cohen?"

The woman checked her computer and smiled. "You're right on time. Follow me, he's expecting you."

Kirsten nodded and followed the woman, arms holding Ryan tightly. The nurse smiled kindly, helping Ryan jump onto the table. She did the basics, took his blood pressure, temperature, etc, before noting the results on his chart. "Dr. Roberson'll be here soon." The nurse said with a kind smile.

Kirsten smiled back and nodded, "Thank you."

Dr. Roberson, a tall man with dark hair, came in and smiled. "Hello Kirsten. Where's Seth?"

"It's not Seth this time. It's my oldest, Ryan. Ryan, this is Dr. Roberson. Dr. Roberson, my son Ryan."

"Nice to meet you Ryan. Recently adopted?"

Ryan gave a small smile and a quick nod. "Yeah. But don't ask me why. They wanted to keep me around, so they adopted me."

"They're good people. All right then, what's the problem?"

Kirsten watched Ryan's eyes droop and took the responsibility of explaining. "I got a call from Ryan's school. He had a seizure after lunch. He's been sweating like crazy at night for the last week and he had a headache this morning. He also said that he hurts. Oh, and he threw up this morning, too, complained of being nauseous."

"Huh. That's quite the complaint list. Anything else Ryan?"

Ryan shrugged. "I haven't had much of an appetite all week and I feel so tired. I'm always tired. Oh, and I've got these red spots all over me."

Dr. Roberson's eyebrows went up. "Really? Can I see?"

Ryan shrugged again and slowly pulled off his long sleeved sweater. Sure enough, the red spots covered him from neck to belt. There was even a couple on his face. Dr. Roberson nodded, stepping back. "Can you get undressed for me? Just down to your underwear?"

Ryan nodded and bent slowly to untie his shoes. He didn't get over far enough before he grunted in pain. Kirsten came over and knelt at his feet, starting to untie his shoes and pull them and his socks off. Ryan undid his pants and stood, letting them fall to his ankles. He sat back down, wearing only his boxers as Kirsten took his clothes and started to fold them into a neat pile beside her. The doctor reached out and started to feel around his liver before shifting again. Ryan jumped as Roberson's cold hands felt quickly around his armpits and groin. "You've got some swelling in your lymph nodes, but nothing serious. I want to take some blood tests and see what they say."

Ryan nodded and rubbed his inner arm in apprehension. Dr. Roberson smiled and patted the boy's shoulder. "I'll send one of the nurses in here to take some blood and then I'll be back to tell you what I think. How are you feeling now? Tired? Sore? What?"

"I'm tired, and my bones ache. I have a headache too."

"You want some Tylenol?" Kirsten asked, digging in her purse.

Roberson nodded, "That might be a good idea. However, wait until after the blood tests are taken. Then you can have some. I'll be back, couple hours at the latest. Take a quick nap, see if it'll help."

Ryan gave a small smile as the doctor ruffled his hair. "Thanks."

"Not a problem. That nurse should be here in a second."

Ryan nodded and flopped back against the exam bed. Roberson gave Kirsten a quick smile before leaving. Ryan sat up again and held out a hand. Kirsten handed him his pants, knowing that's what he was most concerned with. Ryan stepped into them quickly before sitting down again as the nurse entered the room. "Hi Ryan, my name's Clarisse. I promise, this won't take very long and then you can take that nap."

Ryan gritted his teeth as Clarisse took her blood and left the room. Kirsten grabbed the blanket he'd come in with as he laid back on the table. She draped it over him and then kissed his forehead. "Get some rest baby. I'll be here when you wake up."

The exhausted teenager closed his eyes and slipped quietly into sleep. About two hours later, the results of the various tests started to come back and Dr. Roberson's demeanor started to fall. Ryan was so tired, he didn't even notice. But Kirsten noticed and began to get very concerned. "Kirsten, I want you to take Ryan to the hospital and check him in. I'll call a colleague of mine, an oncologist by the name of Reynolds. I want to have him run a few more tests."

Kirsten froze. She knew what an oncologist was; her mother had died of leukemia after all. "Why? What's wrong?" she asked, her concern growing tenfold.

"I don't want to raise any major worries right now. But I do want a second opinion."

Kirsten's fear was rising exponentially, but she was determined to keep on a brave face for Ryan. She nodded. "All right. Come on Ryan."

Ryan hopped off the table unsteadily and leaned against his mother's steady strength. Kirsten held him close and led him back to the car. Ryan insisted on sitting in the passenger seat and climbed in quietly. As Kirsten drove, Roberson faxed the results to his colleague. Dr. Reynolds gave the coversheet a quick once-over and then looked over the fax. Snatching up the phone, he called his friend and asked for the boy's medical file to be delivered to the hospital via courier. Roberson agreed and then hung up. Reynolds dashed for the hospital front desk. "Mary Anne. Dr. Roberson is sending in a patient to undergo testing, a Ryan Cohen. Page me when he's checked in."

"Yes sir."

Dr. Reynolds nodded and ran to set up a room for the teenager.


	6. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

Chapter 5: The Diagnosis

When Kirsten ushered Ryan into the hospital, he was being his usual stubborn self, insisting that he was fine and didn't need to be checked into the hospital. Kirsten just gave him the look that said she wasn't going to let him just leave and Ryan lapsed into silence. Ryan was checked in and led to his room, and handed a hospital gown to change into. Dr. Reynolds came in to his room a couple minutes later. "Hey Ryan, Mrs. Cohen. I'm Dr. Reynolds. Let's see what the problem was. I'm going to run basically all of the same tests that Dr. Roberson did, except for a couple extra. I'm going to take a bone marrow biopsy and a lumbar puncture."

Ryan stared blankly. Dr. Reynolds smiled and explained. "I'm going to use a needle and extract a piece of bone and bone marrow from your hip. It's not too bad. The lumbar puncture, or a spinal tap, is pretty painful. But after that, I'll leave you alone and go see what we've got."

Ryan nodded and took a deep breathe. He looked at Kirsten. "You don't have to stay if you need to go to work."

"No, baby, I'm not leaving you. I'm staying right here. I promise." She insisted, brushing back his hair.

The bone marrow aspiration, as Reynolds called it, was pretty easy. It was just a bump on the hip, but the spinal tap was very painful. Ryan laid on his left side, tears streaking down his face as Kirsten held his hand, stroking his hair and speaking to him quietly.

Nearly three hours and at least 10 new tests later, Ryan lay in his hospital room, sound asleep. Kirsten was sitting in the chair by the bed, stroking the back of his hand with tender fingertips. Reynolds came in, looking very serious. He had the faxed sheet as well as the new results sheet.

They were identical. His friends' diagnosis had not been wrong, despite how badly they'd wanted it to be.

_Damn it, he's too young to have to deal with this_, was his thought before he met Kirsten's worried eyes.

"What's wrong with my son?" she questioned, hoping for the best.

"Mrs. Cohen, your son….he has leukemia. Acute lymphocytic leukemia to be specific."

Kirsten's eyes grew wide and her hands flew to cover her mouth. Reynolds could practically see the heartbreak. He crouched beside her and took her hands gently. "Acute leukemia is treatable. He'll need a bone marrow transplant, along with some chemotherapy and possibly radiation. The transplant isn't guaranteed, but it's better than nothing. Siblings are usually the best candidates for a match in bone marrow."

Kirsten nodded, looking over her shoulder at her son. "I have to call my husband and Ryan's friends. They'll want to know."

"Of course. I'll have the nurse keep an eye on him. I'm sorry that I don't have better news."

Kirsten nodded and disappeared from the room. Walking outside, she pulled out her cell phone and called Sandy's cell, thinking that at five o'clock, he was mostly likely on his way home for work. "Cohen," came the soothing and deep voice that Kirsten relied so heavily on.

"Sandy, it's Kirsten." She sobbed, just now letting her emotions come out.

"Kirsten, what's wrong?"

"It's Ryan. We're at the hospital. He had a seizure today during school. He has leukemia, acute lymphocytic leukemia. Just like my mother. My son has cancer."

"I'm on my way." Sandy said, knowing that this was hard on his wife. She'd lost one son; she didn't want to loose the other.

"No, Sandy, the doctor said that a bone marrow transplant could cure him. He also said that siblings are the best candidates for a match."

Sandy understood then what she was asking. "You want me to go and see Trey, in hopes of a cure."

"Yes. If Trey agrees to be tested and is a match that can save my son, he'll have earned my eternal gratitude."

Sandy nodded, packing his briefcase quickly. "All right. I'll go and see Trey. And I'll be at the hospital as soon as I'm done."

"Thank you. Our son needs his father."

"Tell him I love him when he wakes up."

"I will. I'm never going to stop telling him."

Kirsten hung up with her husband and forced her hands to stop shaking. The hard part was over. Now she just had to tell Ryan's friends. She dialed up Anka. Though the two women had grown up in completely different worlds- Anka in Philly with 14 juvenile delinquent brothers and a ratty old shack over her head and Kirsten with a big house and Daddy's credit card to hand- through their sons they had become fast friends over the past week. The phone rang twice and then Anka answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Ani! Are the boys there?"

"Ben and Nathan are at Ben's diabetes dialysis but the rest of the boys are here."

"When Ben and Nathan get home, could you send the boys to the hospital? I'll tell them why when they get here."

Anka could hear the tremor in her friend's voice. "What's wrong Kirsten?" she asked, before remembering something that Ben had said after he got home from school. "Ben mentioned that there was something wrong with Ryan after lunch. Is that it? Do you know what's wrong?"

Kirsten sniffed back tears and instead of answering, asked instead, "Could you come with the boys?"

"You got it honey. I'll see you soon, an hour at most."

"Thank you Ani."

"It's not a problem. When the twins get home, we'll be on our way."

Kirsten thanked her friend again and then called up Summer, knowing that Marissa would be with her until they heard something about Ryan. The two women held a quick conversation, during which Kirsten asked Summer to bring Marissa to the hospital in an hour, and then Kirsten ran back to Ryan's room. Ryan was still sleeping, obviously wiped out. So Kirsten retook her seat and just watched him as he slept the dreams of the unconcerned.

An hour later, the usual teenagers- minus one- met up with Kirsten in the waiting room. Anka looked at the woman in front of her and her heart broke for her. Kirsten was a broken woman. She came over and wrapped the older woman in a tight hug. "What's wrong, Kirsten?"

Kirsten broke down into tears, her knees collapsing under the weight of her grief and pain. Ani went down with her, still trying to comfort her friend. "Ryan has cancer." She cried, sobs shuddering through her tiny form.

Marissa's face dropped and she turned an alarmingly pasty white. Jesse managed to get an arm around her waist before she fainted. Ben stepped forward and crouched beside his mom and his best friend's grieving mother. "Have you told him yet?"

Kirsten shook her head, brushing ineffectually at her tears. "Not yet. I want to wait for Sandy."

"Where is Sandy?" Aidan asked, pulling a quietly crying Summer into his arms, allowing her to bury her face in his chest.

"I sent him to see Trey. Ryan has acute lymphocytic leukemia. It's treatable; he needs a bone marrow transplant. Siblings are the best possibilities for a match."

"Thus, a use for Trey." Matt said, nodding, "Makes sense."

Another moment passed and Sandy came into the hospital. He spotted his wife and headed their way. The second the wife met the eyes of the husband, she knew something was wrong. She lunged forward into his arms, burying her face into his chest, his arms wrapping her almost desperately. Sandy held his wife for a moment as he examined the faces of the people around her. "Thank you all for coming," he said, his voice roughened by tears.

Kirsten looked up and her eyes practically begged him for good news. Sandy spoke quietly. "I talked to Trey. He said that if he could help, he would. However, Ryan is not his real brother. Ryan was adopted by the Atwood Clan the day he was born."

"Does Ryan know that?" Jesse asked, knowing that his friend did not.

"He was never told." Sandy replied, waiting for his wife's reaction to the heartrending news.

It took a moment but what Sandy had said finally sunk in. Ryan had no cure; Trey had been her -their- one hope. "My baby is going to die, isn't he? Just like my mother did."

"No! We'll do everything we can. I've already got Rachel helping me to find his biological parents. We will find his family. And maybe, just maybe, they'll help us."

Kirsten nodded and then wiped her eyes. "It's time to tell Ryan."

Sandy nodded and took her hand, the two heartbroken parents filled with dread. Ryan was just waking up as they came in. "Hey Sandy." Ryan said with a small smile, before realizing that both were somber. "Why the long faces? Did someone die?" he asked, using Seth's typical response to sadness- sarcastic wit.

His heart fell a little bit when neither smiled or laughed. Kirsten came to the side of the bed and took Ryan's hand. "Baby I talked to the doctor about an hour ago."

"All right; what did he have to say?"

"You have cancer, Ryan. Leukemia; to be more specific, acute lymphocytic leukemia."

Ryan drew back slightly, his eyes wide and searching. "What about Trey?"

Sandy spoke now. "What about him?"

"I did a report on Leukemia for Health class a couple years ago. A bone marrow transplant is a good hope for a cure for leukemia. Siblings are the best matches. So, what about Trey?" he asked, trying very hard to keep in his tears.

"Ah well, that's where it gets complicated. Trey can't help."

"Why not?" he asked, his voice just now starting to sound like tears.

"Ryan, you were adopted the day were born. Trey isn't your real brother. Dawn isn't your mother, and Jason isn't your father."

Ryan sat back. He knew what that meant; he was up a creek without a paddle. And the life-threatening part- the rapids- were still straight ahead of him.

"Shit," he said without thinking.

Kirsten smacked his mouth automatically, saying, "Don't swear Ryan."

"Yes, ma'am." Ryan said, with a small smile. Despite everything that was going on, Kirsten was still Kirsten. Mothering and sometimes overprotective.

Kirsten chuckled, having noticed exactly what Ryan had noticed. "How are you doing, Ryan?"

Ryan shrugging, thinking hard and trying to recall a long ago research paper. "There's a smaller chance for a donor now, but there's still a chance. I'll just have to fight it for as long as I can."

Kirsten smiled sadly, kissing his forehead and forcing a cheerful smile. "That's my boy. And heaven knows, you're just as stubborn as any Nichol or Cohen I've ever come across. You'll be just fine. I know you will be baby."

Ryan smiled tiredly, leaning back against his pillow and closing his eyes. Kirsten held tightly to his hand, running her fingers over it. Sandy watched the two, feeling almost like an outsider, noticing that even after Ryan fell asleep, Kirsten continued to rub his hand as though Ryan knew she was doing it.


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: First, Marissa still lives with Jimmy. I couldn't bear for her to move in with Caleb. I don't like the man. Secondly, none of that inky Jimmy/Julie takes place in my story (and none of the Lindsay mess either). Thirdly, Kirsten runs the Newport Residence Firm, which used to be the Newport Group, after whole mess with Caleb. Fourthly, here are some Kindly words for my Kindly reviewers.

mmm-marabou: I hope you continue to read this. I love this story and really enjoy it. And yes, I already have the ending figured out. Unfortunately, Seth isn't in it for another couple chapters. I hope you can forgive me.

Elebridth: Yeah, leukemia. I'm sorry about your aunts. I apologize if this brings back bad memories. If it does, I totally understand if you don't read it anymore. Still, I'm glad you like this so far.

Marybeth: Seth won't be back for awhile. I'm sorry. We do, however, have some people return. And Seth is in Tahiti, not Portland. But I hope you continue to read anyway.

J: I hope you like this chapter. It focuses some on the Kirsten/Ryan bonding I always think that the show leaves out.

Chapter 6: Battles & Discoveries

Ryan flatly refused to stay in the hospital. So, Dr. Reynolds agreed to let Ryan go home between chemotherapy sessions. The first one took place the same night Ryan was diagnosed.

Ryan spent that night in his bathroom, throwing up.

A couple days later, Anna Stern flew in from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, with Luke Ward right on her heels from Portland, Oregon. Marissa had called both teens, knowing that both were good friends of Ryan's. The two teens had enrolled at Harbor again and both had moved into the Cohen pool house. Jimmy had given Sandy and Kirsten permission to set up a room in the house for Marissa, so that Marissa could spend the night with her boyfriend on some of the nights he felt okay. Summer also had a room in the Cohen home, unable to be too far from her friends.

The four teenagers, plus the five Mavericks, were found at Ryan's bedside whenever they could be there. It had been hard to believe at first, but pretty soon, the attraction between Anna and Luke had been impossible to deny. Ryan had been the first to notice and the first to push them out the door for their first date. The two were now a happy couple, brightening Ryan's days with their childish bickering and interesting conversations.

Chemo was hard on Ryan. Reynolds had one catheter inserted into a vein in his chest and another catheter, called an Ommaya reservoir, placed under his scalp, to get at the cancer in the cerebrospinal fluid. The leukemia in this fluid had caused his headaches and his seizure; the catheter in his chest however, didn't reach the spinal fluid. He went to the hospital three times a week to undergo chemo and twice a week for radiation treatments.

He had already been tired, but now he was exhausted. He spent most of his time in bed, either sleeping, studying or talking to his friends, or he was in the bathroom throwing up. His hair started to fall out and soon he was never very far from a hat of some sort. Kirsten would never forget when he had accidentally scraped his hand on the corner of his nightstand and had bled like crazy for nearly thirty minutes before the blood stopped flowing. He bruised easy and was always lethargic. Kirsten had let him go to school in the beginning, but eventually took him out, putting him in correspondence classes so that he could keep up.

Meanwhile Sandy had begged the law firm he worked at for a reprieve in his assignments so that he could find Ryan's biological family. And nearly three months after Ryan's diagnosis, Sandy came across the adoption papers. It was three weeks till Christmas and Sandy couldn't think of any better Christmukkah present than giving Ryan hope for a cure and a new life.

When Sandy got home early that afternoon, he went up the stairs toward Ryan's room. Ryan spent most of his time there, too tired to leave the bed. Kirsten had handed her company over to her Vice President temporarily, staying at home with Ryan as much as possible. She had taken to sitting with him during the day while his friends were at school. When Sandy pushed open the door, he followed the long hallway toward the open part of the room. Leaning against the corner, he smiled at the sight in front of him.

Ryan was lying in bed, dressed warmly in a sweatshirt and a pair of heavy sweatpants, covered from neck to toes in quilts and blankets. _Today must have been a chills day, _Sandy thought, as he watched. Kirsten was sitting on the bed, leaning back against the headboard, holding a book. Ryan's bald head was lying on her stomach, his ear level with her belly button. Kirsten's fingers ran gently over his head as she read to him from Bernard Cornwell's Heretic.

Kirsten's voice was soothing as she read:

"There should have been jubilation after the easy victory, but the old mood, the sullen mood, returned to haunt the garrison at Castillon d'Arbizon. They had done well in the fight, but the death of the priest had horrified Thomas' men. Most of them were unrepentant sinners, some had killed priests themselves, but they were all superstitious and the friar's death was regarded as an omen. Father Roubert had ridden forward unarmed, he came to parley, and he had been shot down like a dog. A few men applauded Genevieve. She was a proper woman, they said, a soldier's woman, and the Church could be damned for all that they cared, but those men were a small minority."

Sandy cleared his throat just then. Kirsten stopped reading and looked up. Ryan had known that Sandy was there and smiled at his father. "Hi, Sandy." He whispered, in the hoarse tone that had become his voice. "Come sit down."

"What're you reading?"

"Heretic." Kirsten supplied, showing the cover of the book. "Ryan's history class is going over the Hundred Year's War and The Archer's Tale, Vagabond, and Heretic are the required reading for the section. I usually read them to him. It's turning out to be educational for the both of us."

"That's good," Sandy said, running a hand over the smooth skin of Ryan's head. "How are you feeling Ryan?"

"Tired, as usual. I had chemo today, so I'm feeling kinda sick. But it comes and goes. How was your day?"

Sandy kissed his wife's forehead and answered his son. "Much better. I finally managed to get a hold of your adoption records. Now I just need to find the papers the mother signed to give up all rights to you."

Ryan nodded, ducking his head quickly to try and swallow the nausea creeping up his esophagus. When he was back in control of himself, he spoke again. "How long will that take?"

"Hopefully, before Christmas. I can't imagine a better present. Can you?"

"No." Ryan said, his eyes starting to drift closed.

Sandy bent over, pressing a gentle kiss to Ryan's crown. "I'm going to steal your mother for a moment, okay? Will you all right?"

Ryan nodded with a small smile. "I'll be fine. Go on, Mom. I'm okay."

Kirsten nodded back and placed a kiss to both eyes, the tip of his nose and both cheeks. "Get some rest baby. I'll be right outside if you need me."

Ryan swallowed several times in succession, before lunging out of bed and dashing for the bathroom. Kirsten looked back at Sandy and he waved her after Ryan. "I'll be in the kitchen, ordering takeout. What do you think he can handle tonight?"

"Juice, maybe. Just get whatever you want. Don't forget to ask Anna and Luke in the pool house. I have to make him something he can keep down. Probably some chicken broth and Earl Grey tea."

Sandy nodded and kissed his wife again before Kirsten raced into the bathroom with her son. Ryan was vomiting violently, his entire body shaking with the force of each heave. Sobs choked him and tears ran down his face. This was now a common sight for Kirsten, but that didn't mean that her heart didn't wrench in her chest every time she watched it happen. Unable to do anything else, she rubbed her hand over his back, speaking to him quietly. After a while, he started to dry heave and then his body shuddered and calmed, deciding that there was nothing else to bring up.

He sat there, dragging in air in large gulps. Kirsten stood, filling the glass by the sink with water. Tipping it to his lips, she ordered, "Swish."

Ryan rinsed his mouth out and then spit the fouled water into the toilet bowl. Taking another sip from the cup his mother held, he swallowed slowly. "Better?" she asked gently.

"Yeah." He whispered, reaching up and flushing the toilet before standing slowly.

Kirsten caught him as he swayed on his feet. "All right. Easy. Come on, let's get you back into bed."

Ryan leaned against his mom as she walked him back to his bed. Flopping into bed, he pulled his legs under the covers and let Kirsten tuck him in snuggly. Although it had not been easy at first, Ryan had come to accept Kirsten's affection and mothering. Now, he didn't know what he'd do without it. "Love you Mom."

"You too baby. Get some rest Ry. Anna and Luke'll be home soon."

Ryan nodded and closed his eyes, shivering slightly. "I'm cold momma."

"All right, I'll turn up the thermostat. Just close your eyes." She whispered, running her fingers over his topknot.

Ryan sighed and fell easily into sleep.

Kirsten stood and then left the room, cranking the thermostat up. She joined her husband in the kitchen. Sandy was staring at a sheet of paper in his hands. "What's wrong?" she asked, grabbing a cup of coffee leftover from that morning.

"I found the paper that his mother signed."

"Really? That's great! Now we just have to find her. See if she has any more children."

"She does. A son. Named Seth." Sandy said, looking up at his wife.

"How do you know?" Kirsten asked, teasing. "Are you psychic?"

"No, I'm her son's father." Sandy said, tossing the sheet of paper onto the counter in front of Kirsten.

Kirsten looked at him strange, picking up the paper to look it over. She scanned it and then stared. "Holy Jesus and Moses."

There, at the bottom of the page, was an incredibly familiar signature.

Hers.


	8. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own this. If you recognize this, I didn't create it.

An: I'm sorry you've been waiting for so long. I was trying to make Kirsten's explanation to Sandy appropriately good. I hope you enjoy. And now, Kindly words for my Kindly Reviewers.

JenJenxx: Welcome to the Party! I'm sorry! I didn't meant to upset you. Here's the rest of the scene.

waitingtuesday: I'm sorry you're confused. If you want, you can email me and I'll let you in on whatever confuses you.

Rachel Carter McKenzie: This is the story to why Kirsten gave up her firstborn son. Sandy doesn't even know that she had a son before Seth. Keep that in mind, please. I hope you like this story.

Little Miss Kiki: I hope this suits your urge to see Kirsten explain this. Sandy doesn't get as upset as the Nana however, who will make her grand entrance in the next chapter.

mmm-marabou: I'm glad you forgive me. I'm also glad that you enjoyed the story and didn't see the twist at the end. Keep reading please.

Elebridth: I'm glad you'll keep reading. And ask my other reviewers for a story called "Healer" in the King Arthur section. Cliffhangers are what I do best. They're a gift. ;) J/K

summerethryrissa: Yep, wish Ryan lots of get wells. Because it's not going to be for awhile. And I'm glad you liked Luke and Anna. I always thought they were more suited to each other. Anna's so down to earth and Luke's so…not. If you know what I mean. If not, I'll explain at a later date.

Babak: You doll you! Of course I would add in a totally unexpected surprise! This is what I do. I have to keep you on your toes. You wouldn't love me nearly as much if I just solved all of life's problems so simply. Admit it! ;) Have to make it interesting. And Ryan is only Kirsten's child. It gets confusing. I hope you continue to read.

Marybeth: You liked that phrase, did you? So do I. I actually use it, all the time. And I'm glad you guessed my surprise. (Wait a minute, what am I saying? No I'm not! ;) J/K) I hope you continue to enjoy this story.

J: Very twisty. And slightly twisted. I hope you continue to read.

CynthiaB: Yes, intrigued is a word. I promise. I'm glad you liked Ryan's newfound reliance on Kirsten. It's hard facing this kind of situation without the support and blatant love from your mother and others that you love. I speak from personal experience. Keep reading.

Chapter 7: Renewed Hope

"Anything you want to tell me?" Sandy asked, his eyes dark and stormy as he watched his wife. He knew that Kirsten had not been virgin before their marriage (he hadn't been either) but he hadn't known of any children.

Kirsten took a deep breath and took a stabilizing drink of coffee, trying to regain her balance after being knocked brutally off her axis. "Why don't we sit down in the living room? Ryan's sleeping down the hall. I want to be able to catch the kids before they go wake him up. He needs all the rest he can snatch."

Sandy nodded and followed her toward the living room, determined to reserve final judgment. He sat down on the couch, watching Kirsten take the seat across from him so that she could see the front door. Wringing her hands slightly, she blurted out, "You remember Larry, right?"

Sandy cocked an eyebrow. Of course he remembered Larry. How could he forget dirty, drunken, reprobate Larry, with a rap-sheet the length of Manhattan? Leaning back against the cushions, he cocked an eyebrow at her as he folded his arms across her chest. "I remember Larry. The guy I beat into a bloody pulp. What about him?"

Kirsten took a deep breathe and plunged, "Not long after I met you, when I was still dating Larry, I found out I was pregnant. As we both know, Larry was not the nicest of people. I didn't want my child to grow up like he would have. Remember when I told you my dad called me home?"

At Sandy's nod, she blushed shame-faced, "I lied. I ran away and stayed away for six months. When my child -a beautiful boy with the bluest eyes I've ever seen- was born, I gave him up. I almost didn't. I almost kept him and took him home with me. But I couldn't have protected him or cared for him the way he deserved to be protected or cared for. At the time, I could only hope that the family that adopted him would love him like I loved him. They were recommended to me as good people."

Kirsten looked at the floor, reminded of the stories Ryan told her about his childhood. "I guess the recommendation was forged. If I hadn't given Ryan up as a baby, he would have been with our family this whole time. He never would have suffered through his childhood."

Hearing the tears in his wife's voice, Sandy spoke gently. "You did what you thought was best. You didn't know that Dawn and Dave Atwood would be his parents." Pausing, he nibbled on his lower lip, before asking curiously, "Did you forget him?"

Kirsten stood, going to the china hutch. Reaching into a rarely used jar, she pulled out a well-worn piece of paper. Handing it to Sandy, Sandy was surprised to see it was a picture of a baby. His eyes were fiercely blue, and not newborn blue but sapphire blue, with a tuft of blond hair sticking out from under his tiny hat. He was staring solemnly at the camera, a small smile lurking at the corner of his lips. "I never forgot him. I'd get up sometimes after Seth was born and pull out that picture and wonder if he was all right. I always regretted giving him up. I don't think I ever forgave my younger self for making that decision."

Sandy nodded, sitting back against the couch and continuing to stare at the picture of Ryan as a baby. "You know, I read somewhere that sometimes Leukemia is genetic."

Kirsten looked confused for a moment, before seeing what he'd meant. "Which could mean that Ryan got it because my mother had it. She had the same kind of cancer."

"I know. Ryan's young and he's always been healthy. He'll pull through this." Sandy said, seeing that Kirsten was worried whether Ryan's fate would end up like her own mother's. Kirsten smiled at him lightly, thankful that he'd spoken. She reached out and squeezed his hand in thanks. Letting out a long sigh, Sandy continued, "At least, we have a potential cure."

Kirsten stood and stared out the windows toward the beach, nodding once. Her lips were pressed together as she attempted to stave off tears. "Yes, we have a potential cure. If he ever decides to come home."

"Seth will come home. And until then, Ryan will fight this, just like he has been. If there's anything he's inherited from the Nichols, it's Caleb's stubbornness." Sandy said, chuckling at the thought.

Kirsten looked at her husband, pleading "Please don't tell my dad that. He'd have a heartattack."

Sandy nodded, before coming to another realization. "I guess this makes me Ryan's step-father."

Kirsten nodded, forcing a cheerful smile to her lips. "Yep. That's you, Sandy the step-dad," her face fell as she continued in a whisper, "and me, the mother that abandoned him."

Sandy sensed her pain and pulled her close. "Where has Dawn been through this whole ordeal? You've been at his side every step of the way. You hold his hand during chemo. You're in the waiting room during radiation. You dragged him back into this world from juvie. Not me and not Seth; you. This is where he belongs. And this is where he will stay. Even if he hates you for it, we're not going to let him go. He's a member of this family, now by blood as much as anything else."

Kirsten nodded against his chest, wiping her eyes of their tears. The front door creaked open, Anna and Luke walking in with the rest of Ryan's friends firmly in tow. They were all laughing, Luke exclaiming that Ryan was going to love the story of what had happened to one of the school punks. Looking up, Marissa, Summer and Anna saw the tears in Kirsten's eyes and rushed to her side. "What's wrong? Is it Ryan?"

Kirsten smiled at them, shaking her head. "There's nothing wrong. Sandy has been looking for Ryan's parents. You knew that right?"

Marissa nodded, "He's been really excited about it."

Summer rolled her eyes, "So what? Have you found them? Are they going to help him?"

"In anyway we can," Sandy remarked.

He only got blank stares, everyone's eyes drawn to Kirsten. She smiled sadly. "According to the adoption papers, it would seem that **_I_** was the one who gave him up so many years ago."

"What?" came the simultaneous cries of confusion and surprise.

"It's difficult to explain. I am his biological mother. And Seth is his half-brother."

"So when Seth gets home…." Marissa started, her eyes wide, hardly daring to hope.

Kirsten nodded, understanding why she couldn't finish that statement. "Ryan has a good chance at a bone marrow transplant."

The three girls literally leaped for joy, laughing and hugging each other tightly. Kirsten smiled as the boys stared at them as though they were crazy. "That's so great." Anna laughed, hugging Kirsten next.

Summer was the first to see the problem. "It's great. But not until Cohen comes home."

The other two girls calmed, seeing the same problem. If Seth didn't get home soon, Ryan might not have any more fight left. He might succumb and all of their hoping would have been in vain. Kirsten hugged all three of the girls as they mobbed her, seeking comfort. Kissing each on the temple, she murmured, "Ryan is sleeping. If you're **very** quiet, you can go and do your homework in his room."

"Thanks, Kirsten," Marissa whispered with a big -albeit teary- smile and a gigantic hug.

Kirsten nodded and waved the kids away. Sandy came over and wrapped his arms around Kirsten's waist, resting his chin on her shoulder. "What are you going to tell Ryan?"

Kirsten felt her heart seize. "Oh God. Ryan. He's going to hate me," she gasped, before replying to his question. "I'm going to tell him the truth." Kirsten said, brushing at her tears. "He deserves the truth. And so the truth he will get."

Sandy nodded and then went to go call a pizza place for a pepperoni pizza. The phone rang after he set the phone down causing him to pick it right back up. "Hello?"

"Hi, is Mrs. Cohen there?" asked a cheerful friendly voice from the other end of the line.

"Sure, let me get her." Sandy said, before going into the living room and handing the phone to Kirsten. "It's for you."

Kirsten nodded and took the phone. "Hello? This is Kirsten Cohen."

"Mrs. Cohen, this is Miss Deidre from Dr. Reynolds office. Dr. Reynolds wanted me to call and tell you that Ryan has developed high-risk anemia. He wants to have you bring Ryan in tomorrow at four o'clock to receive a red blood cells transfusion to try and help clear it up," she explained, still using that friendly and open manner of hers.

Kirsten was confused. "How will that help?"

Obviously used to the question, Deidre answered with a question of her own, "Has Ryan had any shortness of breath lately?"

"Whenever he moves too fast or he's been throwing up. It's hard for him to catch his breath."

"That's a side effect of the anemia. The red blood cells will help reduce that as well as some of his fatigue."

"Okay. What time again tomorrow?"

"Four o'clock, Mrs. Cohen."

"All right. I'll have Ryan there. Thank you."

"Not a problem. Tell Ryan to hang in there. We're all pulling for him her at the doc's office."

"I will most definitely tell him. Thank you again."

The nurse said goodbye and then both hung up. Kirsten hung up the phone and then went to scribble the appointment on Ryan's appointment calendar. "Who was that?"

"A nurse from Dr. Reynolds office. Reynolds wants to give Ryan a red blood cell transfusion. He thinks it could clear up some of Ryan's tiredness, as well as help to improve his breathing."

"Oh. I hope it works."

"So do I," Kirsten muttered, before jogging down the hallway toward Ryan's room, next to hers and Sandy's own.

Ryan was awake and laughing lightly along with his friends when Kirsten entered the room. He could hear her footsteps on the carpet, tilting his head back to look at her. "Hi momma. What's up?" he croaked, coughing quietly.

"The doc wants you to go in tomorrow to get a transfusion. He thinks it'll help you breathe easier, and maybe decrease how tired you get." She murmured, crouching beside the bed and rubbing his head gently.

"Okay," he sighed before questioning rhetorically, "I mean, what's one more surgery, right?"

Kirsten smiled sadly, kissing his brow. "Right. Try to keep it down, guys, and Ryan, get some rest."

"Yes Mother." Ryan teased, before throwing teenage restrictions to the four winds, "Love you momma."

Afraid that that would be the last time she heard those words, Kirsten physically had to restrain a sob, murmuring, "I love you too sweetie." Glancing at his friends, she ordered gently, "Be good, you guys."

"But of course, Mrs. Cohen." Nathan laughed, giving his friend's mother his most disarming smile.

Ben rolled his eyes and smacked his twin up the head. "Nathan, you're dumb."

"Why thank you for noticing."

Ryan chuckled at his friends' play and Kirsten smiled at the group before leaving the room quietly and virtually unnoticed.

Later that night, after the Strays had left the house, and the remaining four teenagers were safely in their own rooms, Kirsten entered Ryan's room quietly, dreading what she had to tell her son. Ryan was barely awake, listening to the sound of her footsteps getting closer and watching the end of the hall for her form. "Momma?"

Kirsten nodded, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "Yeah, baby. I have something I need to tell you."

Ryan nodded, pushing himself slowly to a sitting position and leaning back wearily against the headboard, eyes fluttering in an attempt to stay awake. "What's wrong, Mom?"

"Sandy found your mother."

"Really?" Ryan asked, looking about as excited as his exhausted body would allow him.

Reaching out to touch his face, Kirsten began to explain the whole sordid affair. Ryan sat silently, watching her cry. "I'm so sorry, Ryan, if I had known what you would have gone through, I never would have done it," she sobbed, her head bowed in grief. "I completely understand if you hate me now."

Ryan shook his head, reaching out slowly to touch her head. "I don't hate you." He smiled at her as her head came up, her eyes shining with confusion and disbelief. Kissing his cheek, he continued, "You couldn't have taken care of me and so you gave me to someone you hoped could. You didn't know that Dawn would be my mother. I wish Dawn had done the same earlier. I'm home with you and Sandy now and that's all that really matters. I have you back." Ryan said, giving his mother- both adoptive and biological- a tired smile.

Kirsten leaned forward, pressing a shaky kiss to his forehead. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too," he whispered, before yawning widely, "I'm so tired. I hate being so tired."

Kirsten chuckled at the complete turn-around of the conversation. Running gentle fingers over his topknot, she spoke kindly, "I know you do. Get some sleep. You'll need it. Tomorrow's another day."

Ryan chuckled, "Yeah, and another hospital visit. And another treatment. And another surgery." He paused and then slipped into Seth's style of humor, quoting Monty Python and the Holy Grailin a dry even tone, "And there was much rejoicing, yea!"

Kirsten laughed lightly at his humor, tucking him in securely. "I'll see you in the morning, honey."

Ryan nodded, murmuring in return, "I love you Mom," before he rolled onto his stomach and fell asleep as soon as his eyes slid closed.

Kirsten left the room with one last kiss to his head, and entered her own. Sandy was already in bed, his laptop resting on his legs, looking up all the hotels in Tahiti. "Did you know that Seth took his credit card?" he asked absently, typing furiously.

Kirsten looked at her husband. "No. He did?"

"Yeah. We just got the bill."

"Well, where is he?"

"He's in Tahiti. And he's staying in a pretty ritzy hotel."

"Can we get him home?"

"I'm going to call the hotel tomorrow. And see if I can't get a hold of him."

Kirsten nodded and dressed in her pajamas. "This is good news. Seth needs to come home. Ryan hides it well, but he misses his brother."

Sandy nodded, turning to kiss her head lightly, "How'd it go."

"He doesn't hate me."

"Well, that's progress. When does soccer season end? I thought I'd get tickets for one of the professional games that are coming to town. Give something Ryan to look forward to."

"March. You might not want to do that; Ryan can't play soccer. He's team captain, and he can't play. It's breaking his heart."

Sandy looked down at his wife in shock. "Wait a minute! He's still on the team?"

"Yeah, the coach wouldn't cut him. I was there when Ryan told him he had leukemia and couldn't play. But the coach just said that the entire team was made up of people that Ryan had played with last year. And they'd be furious if Ryan was cut. Luke took over as active captain and they dedicate every game to Ryan. But, Ryan's a member of a team he can't play on."

Sandy commented dryly, "That's gotta be frustrating for Ryan."

"Just a little. But he said that he'd like to see them play once this year, as his birthday present."

"He will be 18 soon huh?"

"Yep. I want to throw him a huge party. But I know he won't have it. So I'm going to throw a small party, just the Strays, Anka, Anna, Luke, Marissa, Summer, Dad & Julie, Jimmy & Hailey, and us."

"I think he'd like that."

"I think he would too," she agreed, before remembering Dawn Atwood. Though it was unlikely, there was still a chance that the woman who had raised, abused and abandoned Ryan could come back. Laying her head on his chest and watching the computer screen flash distantly, she rambled idly, "I want to change Ryan's name to Nichol-Cohen. He already has the Cohen name, but I want him to have my maiden name as well. He's my son."

"Ultimately the final decision is always Ryan's." Seeing her crestfallen look, Sandy kissed her temple and continued, "I'll talk to him in the morning, and if that's what he wants me to do, I'll set the process in motion. Is that okay?"

"That's perfect, but I think he'll be pretty easy going about the idea." Reaching up, she closed the laptop and moved it to the nightstand. Taking up her usual place sprawled across his chest, she murmured sleepily, "Go to sleep. I have to take Ryan to the hospital again tomorrow."

Sandy smiled down at her fondly, kissing her temple lightly. "Good night, Kirsten," he paused and whispered intimately, "I love you."

Kirsten, already half asleep, murmured in return, "I love you Sandy. You and the boys are my world."

"Sleep my love. I'll see you in the morning."

Seconds later, her even breathing signaled that she was asleep. Sandy bent and whispered again, "You are my universe."


	9. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: This is a little short, but oh well. The next one will be longer to make up for it. And now, Kindly words for my kindly Reviewers.

Raindrops falling: I apologize. I call my mom, "Momma" so I write it that way. I'll change it. Usually it's Mom, but when he's sick or tired, it's Momma. Kind of a vulnerability thing. Again, from experience.

Babak: I love you sweetheart. Be mine! And I'm glad you're happy we found Seth. And I'm even gladder you kept in mind that I never let anything end that easily. You know me so well! ;) And I'm glad you felt for Kirsten. It's hard to give up a child, and even harder to realize that you made a wrong decision in doing it.

jhhhhjfjk89: Okay! Welcome to the party! Can I inquire how you chose your name? Just out of curiosity? I hope you continue to enjoy this story. And don't cry! I'm posting more as we speak. I'll be back on Monday.

CynthiaB: I thought it sounded good too. I mean it just flows. Ryan Nichol-Cohen. Rock on!

JenJenxx: I'm glad you're not upset. And I hope you like this chapter. It's a pretty emotional, family scene. Minus Seth. Soon I promise. (dodges rotten fruit. Looks up. Is it safe to come out yet? blink blink)

J: This chapter isn't much RyRissa, but next chapter is chock full of it. So I hope you continue reading. This is more Cohen bonding.

Anyone I missed, I hope you like this chapter.

I hope you enjoy! Read on, young grasshoppers! And then tell me what you think!

Chapter 8: In Its Rightful Place

It was nearly a week later when Sandy came home whistling. Ryan, sitting on the couch listening to his home-school teacher explain his physics lesson, looked up curiously. "Sandy?" he questioned, looking puzzled.

Sandy only smiled at his son. "Where's your mother?"

Ryan glanced at his teacher in confusion, before pointing down the hallway toward his room and the master bedroom. "She's in her room. She was going to work on something while I had school."

Sandy nodded, glancing at the teacher, a woman by the name of Ms LeAnn Adams. "Hello, LeAnn. Do you think it'd hurt Ryan's grades to take the rest of the day off?"

"Anyone else, I'd say yes," LeAnn started, before she shook her head, with a soft chuckle, "In Ryan's case? Not likely. I'll just take my leave then."

Sandy nodded, shaking the woman's hand before leaving to find his wife. Ryan looked up at his teacher. "Thanks, Ms Adams," he murmured, with a tired smile.

"Have a good day, Ryan. Don't forget to work on that homework we talked about. It shouldn't be too hard."

Ryan nodded, slumping backward against the plush cushions of the couch. LeAnn, used to taking care of him during his lessons, grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and draped it over his shivering body. Pushing teasingly on the brim of his cap, she pushed it gently over his eyes. He pushed it back, smiling at her. "Good afternoon, Ryan. I'll see you tomorrow."

Ryan nodded and then leaned back as LeAnn let herself out. Leaning over with a groan, he grabbed his physics book and started to read his assignment.

Sandy came into his room, seeing Kirsten working on something on the bed. She looked up, her brow furrowing in confusion. Glancing at the clock, she stood. "What are you doing home so early?"

"I have a surprise for you and Ryan."

"Ms Adams is here for Ryan's lessons. She won't leave until 2 o'clock. It's only 12:30."

"I sent her home. Come on," he insisted, pulling her from her room.

Kirsten laughed, enjoying the sight of her husband so carefree. Ryan looked up from his book, smiling at his mother. "Hey. I was just doing my homework. What's going on?"

"I don't know," Kirsten muttered, "Ask your father."

Ryan chuckled at her, knowing that Kirsten hated surprises. "What's going on, Sandy?"

He reached into the bag over his shoulder. Looking at Kirsten, he spoke. "I stole your picture of Ryan."

Kirsten's eyes widened and she sank down next to her son. "Why? What did you do with it?"

"This," he said, displaying a frame triumphantly.

There in the frame was the picture of Ryan as a baby. Kirsten's eyes filled with tears and she reached to take it from her husband. The photo was crisp and clear, not at all like the cracked and wrinkled photo she had cherished for all the years of their marriage. "How?"

Sandy grinned and sat down across from them. "I took it to a photo restoration place. They copied it and then made it clearer. So it's almost as good as new."

Ryan was staring at the photo and then spoke for the first time. "You're telling me that's me?"

Kirsten looked back at her son and nodded. "Yes, Ryan. That's you. The nurses took pictures of every baby that went through their nursery. They offered it to me when they learned that I had given you up. I didn't want to forget about you so I accepted the picture. The original is rather worse for the wear, I'm afraid."

Ryan nodded, taking the frame from his mother. Running his fingers over his own face as a baby, he looked up at them. "So what are we going to do with it?"

Sandy grinned. "That's the best part."

Taking the frame from his son, he moved to the mantle where photos of Kirsten, Seth, the Christmukkah photo, and he himself sat. Shifting pictures around took some time, but eventually he succeeded in his goal. Clearing a space beside Seth's baby picture, he set Ryan's photo next to it. "Ta da!"

Kirsten's hands flew to her mouth. She had always wished that she could have had a picture of Ryan as a baby. And now, there on her mantle, was a picture of Ryan -her son- as a baby. Glancing at Ryan, she noticed the shimmer of tears in his eyes as well. Pulling him close, she murmured. "This was my greatest wish."

Ryan smiled and ducked his head against his mother's chest, his sapphire blue eyes still locked on the photo of a baby, him. Sandy looked between the two. "So? You like?"

Kirsten mocked scowled at him. "As if you don't know. Come here."

Sandy sat down next to them, and the tree of them hugged tightly. The family remained in the living room for the rest of the day, talking about Ryan's studies, their individual projects, etc. And all day, Ryan's eyes strayed to his baby picture, sitting on the Cohen mantle. And every time he saw it, his lips curled up in a small smile. He was **_officially_** a part of the beautiful Cooper-Nichol-Cohen mess that every member called a family.


	10. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

Marybeth: I'm glad you liked it. Today we have the reintroduction of The Nana. I hope you don't like her. And I apologize to all of those who read the original chapter. That wasn't supposed to happen. My computer rejected my additional changes, which meant anything and everything I had deleted, was still in the chapter. So, I apologize again. And I hope you like the original chapter better than the frakked up one. Thank you, have a nice day. Again, I'm sorry!

jhhhhjfjk89: I can accept that. It makes sense. My favorite character in the Arthurian Legends is Galahad, so that's how I got my name. Speaking of King Arthur, stop by that category and read Healer, by yours truly. You might like it if you like this one. Ask Babak. She'll tell you so.

J: Seth comes around soon. Just not yet. And I'm glad you liked the thought of Ryan as a baby. I thought it was an adorable thought, so I put it in.

CynthiaB: Yes, it's the eye in the middle of the hurricane. Namely Hurricane Nana. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

JenJenxx: I'm glad, I hope you continue to enjoy this story.

Babak: I missed your review, sweetie. I updated Healer too. I hope you like it.

Everyone else (raindrops falling, waitingtruesday, Rachel Carter McKenzie (I love your name by the way. I'm half in love with Ben myself. Can't you tell ;) ) Little Miss Kiki, mmm-marabou, Elebridith, summerethryrissa, AgnesSophia and Carebear Stare): I hope you continue to enjoy this story. And read soon.

Chapter 9: A Passover Visitor

The months passed uneventfully, approaching the March holiday of the Jews. Passover, as per usual, wasn't a big deal at the Cohen house. In fact, with Ryan's illness, it was an even lesser deal than usual. The day before, Ryan was on the couch, sleeping beside a pile of his homework when the doorbell rang. His head came up, his eyes staring puzzled at the door. "Mom? Sandy?" he called.

Glancing at the clock, he was surprised to see that several hours had slipped by. Which meant, that he'd fallen asleep again. A note on top of his textbook told him that his mom and Sandy had gone to the pharmacy to refill his prescriptions. The doorbell rang again and Ryan shouted, "I'm coming!"

Fumbling to his feet, he stayed still for a moment so he didn't fall before shuffling toward the front door. Some hazy part of him remembered that he was wearing his pajamas -a pair of worn sweats- but the other part couldn't bring himself to care. Pulling open the door, he blinked several times to see the Nana standing on the door. "Nana?" he questioned, staring at her confused.

Nana Cohen looked her adopted grandson up and down, now seeing little things about him that reminded her of her daughter-in-law. "Hello, Ryan. Can I come in?"

Ryan seemed to shake himself from his daze and nodded, pushing the door open farther. "Come on in. We didn't know you were coming."

"I didn't know I was coming either, until I climbed on a plane and came out here. Is your mother or Sandy home?"

Ryan shook his head, stumbling slightly, before catching himself on the corner of the wall. "No, they left while I was asleep to go and refill my prescriptions. I don't think they expected me to wake up before they got back."

Nana nodded, understanding the thought. Ryan looked like he could fall asleep where he stood. Taking his upper arm gently so as not to bruise the fragile frame, she led her grandson back to the couch. Ryan sunk into it gratefully, before reaching for his cell phone. Nana grabbed it and questioned, "What are you doing?"

"Calling Sandy and Summer. They'll want to be here. Summer adores you and Sandy doesn't know you're here."

Sandy's voice boomed through the room, "Doesn't know that who's here?"

He stopped, shocked, as he came into the living room. Kirsten, reading the page she'd picked up at the pharmacy about leukemia, slammed into his back. "Sandy?" she asked, before she too stared at her mother-in-law. "Nana? What are you doing here?"

"I came to spend Passover with your family, Kirsten, is that such a surprise?"

Kirsten's eyebrow cocked upward as she considered what a surprise that really was. Looking at her son, she smiled to see him awake. "How are you feeling, Ryan?"

"Tired, but I'll be okay. I was about to call Summer."

Anna and Luke came home from school just then, followed by Summer, Marissa, Nathan and Ben. "Call me about what?" Summer asked, before seeing Seth's grandmother. "Nana!" she cried, leaping toward the woman and throwing her arms around him.

"Hello sweetheart. How are you? Where's Sethala?"

Summer's lower lip firmed and Ryan smiled to see her get mean. "Your grandson is out in Tahiti and can't be bothered to come home. The second I see him, I'm going to kill him."

Nana seemed surprised to hear of this turnaround. The year before, when she'd arrived at Passover, Summer and Seth had been one hundred percent besotted with each other. "What happened?"

Ryan spoke up. "I'm afraid it's my fault….." he started, before Summer rounded on him, "It is not your fault, Ryan! Seth ran away because he was being childish and immature."

"He wouldn't have left if I hadn't," the exhausted young man argued, his eyes starting to drift closed.

Marissa, seeming to sense the beginnings of a energy-draining argument on the horizon, stepped in. "How about we talk about this later, okay?"

Ryan looked up at her with a grateful smile as she moved to crouch in front of the couch. "Thanks."

Her fingers came up to smooth gently over his head. "You're welcome. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. Sick. Sore. The usual."

Kirsten came in, handing him three pills and a glass of water. Ryan smiled up at her and swallowed the pills all at once. "Thank you," he murmured, before his eyes slipped closed for the last time and he slept.

Kirsten watched as her step-sister kissed her son's head and then moved to shoo everyone from the room. Marissa remained on the floor in front of the couch, her hand linked with Ryan's and her chin resting on top of them. Kirsten left her there, before shutting the doors to the room. Turning to the Nana, she confessed, "Sandy and I had decided to cancel Passover this year."

"Cancel Passover, Kirsten? You can't just cancel a holiday!"

Sandy stepped in to save his wife. "Ryan can't….."

"Oh pish-posh! He's just fine. Look at me! I have cancer and I'm just fine! He got up to answer the door, didn't he?"

"And you saw how much that wiped him out! He was sleeping when we left, which was about twenty minutes ago. You arrived maybe two minutes ago? And now he's sleeping again. He's always tired. Some things just wipe him out; walking to the dining room table is one of those things. I'm surprised he even agreed to move into the living room earlier this morning. We usually eat in his bedroom so he doesn't have to leave his bed!" Kirsten snapped, trying to protect her son from the woman in front of her. Esther Cohen wasn't fond of Kirsten, never had been, and to learn that Ryan was her son by another man had probably brought The Nana's wrath down upon the ill child as well.

Sandy spoke up. "Leukemia makes you tired to begin with, and then the chemo and radiation therapy only compound it and make it worse. He's always sleeping, but he can never catch up, Mom. Ryan can't leave that couch until two of the boys that showed up help him to his room. Passover in this family is canceled."

"Where is his room; next to Seth's?"

"It was at the beginning of his illness, but as things progressed, the stairs caused a huge problem. He lost his equilibrium a couple times and fell down them. So we moved him into the room next to ours downstairs. Kirsten's close if he needs her, and there are no stairs to hassle with if he feels like coming out of his room. Which isn't often."

Summer reached up and touched Nana's arm. "You're not going to get angry with him, are you?"

Nana looked at her curiously, "What are you talking about?"

"You're not going to get mad at Ryan because his illness is stopping Passover. I'm sure he'd love to have it. He so rarely gets something to celebrate. But he can't."

"If he wanted to have Passover, he could. He's just being a lazy child, taking advantage of his illness to make everyone else do everything for him."

Kirsten's jaw tightened and she moved from the room, before she said something she would regret at a later date. Sandy watched his wife leave and then moved into the living room. Ryan was heaving into the bowl that Marissa held for him. It was then that Sandy remembered he'd had chemo that morning. Crouching beside the couch, he rubbed the boy's back. Ryan groaned, the coughing tearing at his lungs painfully. Sandy kissed the back of his head. "I'll go get your mother."

Ryan's grip tightened around Sandy and he shook his head. "No, don't go," he begged, before heaving again.

Sandy nodded, continuing to rub his back. "Kirsten!" he called as loudly as he dared, knowing that Ryan probably had the headache to end all headaches.

Kirsten appeared in the doorway a moment later and gasped at the sight of her son, pale and coughing. "Ryan!" she cried worriedly, hitting her knees beside Sandy.

Ryan's free hand took hers and he held tightly to both of his parents as the last of it finally came up and he laid there shuddering. "I'm sorry," he sobbed, gasping in air.

Kirsten looked at her son confused. At the beginning, he had apologized every time he got sick and had to throw up. He didn't do so anymore, Kirsten having finally convinced him that it wasn't his fault. Looking around for a reason, she noticed the splatter of vomit on the coffee table. Obviously they hadn't gotten to the basin soon enough. Kirsten rubbed the back of his head. "It's all right, Ryan. We needed a new coffee table anyway. I've always hated this one."

"Liar!" Ryan chuckled tiredly.

"Yeah, well, I hate it now. I'll go get a rag," she reassured him, kissing his forehead.

Disappearing from the room, she grabbed a cloth and went back into the living room. Cleaning up the mess took no time at all and when she left the room again, she was pleased to see Ryan fall peacefully asleep once more. Marissa looked at Sandy, "I need to talk to you and Kirsten."

Sandy nodded, gesturing for her to precede him from the room. They met Kirsten in the kitchen. "He heard her," Marissa announced, with no preamble.

Sandy paled. "My mother? He heard my mother?"

"Yep. He's determined to have Passover. He won't hear the opposite of it. He's determined to prove her wrong."

"She is wrong."

"I know that, you know that and Ryan knows that. But Nana doesn't know that. So, Operation Passover is a go," Marissa stated, grabbing a glass and pouring a glass of milk.

"So, he really wants to go through the whole hassle of sitting at the table and going through the whole mess? The entire meal takes hours. Are you sure he's going to be able to handle it?"

"I don't know. But he is determined to handle it and so we're just going to have to go from there." Marissa insisted, sipping on her drink slowly as she stared at the closed doors of the living room.

Kirsten, knowing that her son hadn't inherited just the blond hair and blue eyes from the Nichol side of the family. He had inherited Caleb's stubbornness as well. Turning away, she started to prepare the Passover supper for that night. Summer, Marissa and Anna helped as the boys played Playstation quietly and kept an eye on Ryan. When it was about an hour before sundown, Nathan reached over to shake Ryan awake. "Hey, Ry?"

Ryan's eyes fluttered for a moment, before he opened them completely. "What's up?"

"It's almost sundown."

Ryan nodded and shoved himself up. Sandy came in to the living room, watching Nathan catch him as he almost fell. "Easy man. Come on; let's take it slow and head toward your room."

Taking a deep breath, Ryan let Nathan and Ben help him hobble slowly toward his room. Sandy slipped in after the two teens left, helping Ryan change. "Are you sure you're up to this? You don't have to."

"I'm doing this, with or without your help, Sandy."

"Your mother would be proud to know how stubborn you truly are," Sandy teased, though his eyes were serious.

Ryan looked up at his step-father, shuddering slightly at the cold. Sandy left him sitting on the bed as he moved toward the closet. Pulling out a pair of warm black slacks and a navy blue sweater, he came back and crouched in front of this boy he loved as much as he loved his own son. "Last chance to back out, Ryan," he insisted, holding out the clothes.

Staring at the clothes in Sandy's hand, he seemed to steel his shoulders and reached to pull the hem of his sweatshirt over the top of his head. Immediately gooseflesh blossomed across his pale skin and Ryan shivered. Handing him a long sleeved thermal shirt and then the sweater, Sandy watched as his oldest son pulled them on. Ryan was never going to make it; he was already listless and the dark circles under his eyes were getting darker. Reaching out, he placed a gentle hand on the bald curve of his son's head. "Ryan, you don't have to do this. You're never going to make it."

Ryan nodded. "I know. But I'm going to stick with it for as long as I can. I'm not going to give her the satisfaction."

Sandy smiled at the typically Nichol response. Despite their differences and equal animosity for each other, Caleb Nichol and his eldest grandson were a lot more alike than either of them cared to admit. Kirsten still hadn't told her father that Ryan was even his biological grandson yet. She was afraid that he would fly off the handle and claim that it was another attempt by "the Juvenile Delinquent" to try and get his money. If the man couldn't see how much Ryan was like Kirsten, that was his own problem.

Kirsten knocked on the door after Ryan pulled on his slacks and did them up. He looked up, giving her a tired smile. "Hey Mom. Are we ready?"

"Just waiting on you, baby. Are you…?"

"If you're going to ask me if I'm sure, the answer is yes. I'm going to do this. I can't guarantee that I'm not going to get sick or suddenly faint, but I'll try."

Kirsten came in and kissed his forehead. "I'm very proud of you. Come on."

Slipping an arm around their son, the two helped him stand. Ryan gave the ghost of a smile as he felt first his mother and then Sandy kiss the top of his head. Closing his eyes, he rested his head on Kirsten's shoulder. "I love you guys."

"Love you too, sweetheart," Kirsten murmured in return, snatching a navy blue hat from the chair and sliding it onto his head, the bill brushing the back of his sweater.

"The Nana is going to freak," Ryan commented with a impish spark in his blue eyes.

Kirsten, grateful to see some life in his eyes, shrugged. "Let her. Personally, you're being very accommodating about this whole Passover thing."

Ryan smiled at his mother. Both of her boys could hear the frustrated and thinly veiled malevolence in her tone. Ryan leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Shall we?"

Sandy nodded, "Shall we indeed."

The trio left the room. Sitting at the table, sent a rush of accomplishment and victory roaring through Ryan unlike any he'd had in awhile. He managed to make it through almost the entire meal, finally having to beg off in favor of sleep. Marissa, seated at his right, squeezed his hand before moving to help him stand. Slipping under his arm, she helped him back to his room. Together, they managed to get him undressed. Slipping between the covers, Ryan sighed in relief at the warmth of soft flannel sheets and the opportunity to be able to rest. Marissa slipped out of his shoes, laying on top of the covers next to him. She propped her chin up onto his shoulder, watching him quietly. Feeling the weight of her gaze, he forced his eyes open. "Whatcha doin'?" he slurred, the last hours starting to catch up to him.

"Nothing, Ryan. Just watching you. Close your eyes. I'll still be here when you wake up."

Ryan nodded and curled closer to her. She ran her fingers softly over the curve of his head, sensing more than seeing his fall into sleep. The door creaked open an hour later and Summer slipped into the room. "Is he okay?" she questioned, crawling onto the bed next to them.

"He's fine. Where are Nathan and Ben?"

"Ani called. They went home. Anna and Luke are in the pool house. The Kirsten and The Nana are doing dishes, trying to quietly kill each other. And Sandy is in his office."

Marissa chuckled slightly, "It was a good Passover this year."

"What do you mean? It was a good Passover last year."

"I know. But this year there was no craziness. I didn't find out about my mom and ex, I didn't run away to Chino and Ryan didn't have to trail me."

Summer chuckled. "You're right. It was a good Passover."

The two girls laughed lightly, before each sprawled out beside Ryan and fell asleep, their heads resting on his shoulders. Kirsten came in to check on Ryan and smiled. Moving quietly to the linen closet, she pulled out an extra blanket and draped it over the top of them. Placing phantom kisses in the air over each of their heads, she murmured, "Sweet dreams my little ones."


	11. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

Babak: I know you reviewed this. But I reuploaded this chapter. I'll tell you how wonderful you are in a couple days.

Chapter 10 : Discovering Family

When Caleb arrived at his daughter's house nearly two weeks later, he was surprised and disgruntled to see the "juvenile delinquent" sitting beside her on the coach. There was a new coffee table in front of them and the plans for a new model home were sprawled across the mahogany surface. Bottles for prescription pills were perched incongruously at the corners of the table, the blond boy reaching for one as he gave a tiny groan. Kirsten grabbed it for him and shook out two pills. Ryan downed them dry and then subsided against her. Kirsten, remembering what Ryan had suggested during the remodeling crisis months ago thereby saving her from perpetual clutter, wanted his opinion on the plans. And if possible, she wanted him to look at the models when they were made.

Ryan listened intently, an unsharpened pencil his pointer as he asked quiet questions and made simple suggestions, around hacking coughs and racking chills. During the middle of an especially painful bout with the coughs, Kirsten pulled him close and rubbed his back, hoping to stabilize him. Seeing shadows across the floor, she looked up. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of her father, and she spoke sharply, "If you're here to send more of your zinging comments at my son, you'll have to come back never."

Caleb shook his head, despite himself very worried when at last Ryan stopped coughing. There was blood flecking the boy's lips and he seemed to have grown several shades paler in the last few seconds. Pulling out his handkerchief, Caleb crouched in front of him, reaching to touch Ryan's face. Ryan jerked back, knowing that he wasn't strong enough to defend himself from his grandfather. Caleb stopped, meeting the boy's eyes. Shuttered and desolate, and exactly the right color, Caleb was inexplicably reminded of his late wife, Aida. "I'm not going to hurt you," he reassured Ryan.

Ryan nodded tiredly, letting Caleb run the cotton across his lower lip to get rid of the blood. "Thank you," Ryan whispered, his eyes closing as he leaned against his mom. The bout had weakened his unusually high stamina and suddenly he felt exhausted once again.

Caleb looked at his daughter as Ryan fell asleep where he lay, blond eyelashes stark against his ashen features. "Can I talk to you?" he asked his daughter quietly, unable to shake the thought that he was somehow seeing his wife lying there on the couch.

Sensing that he wasn't going to fling more insults at her defenseless child, Kirsten carefully transferred Ryan to the couch and covered him with the afghan that had been folded across the back. Since the beginning of his illness, they'd placed either warm flannels or heavy afghans in every room in the house. Ryan was always cold and the blankets were usually in easy reach so that he didn't have to get up and retrieve one from the linen closet. She placed a soft kiss to his head and followed her father into the kitchen, positioning herself so that she could look through the entryway to the room and still see her son. "What do you want, Dad?" she asked, really not in the mood to talk about work or the Newport Group.

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

Kirsten paled a bit, but rallied gamely. "Why do you ask, Dad?"

"That boy has your mother's eyes."

That was all he said and finally Kirsten sighed, leaning forward against the counter. "Ryan is my son, Dad."

Caleb snorted, reminding her shortly, "You've made that abundantly clear countless times, despite everything I've ever said or done."

"No, Dad," Kirsten said, deadly serious.

Suddenly the light bulb seemed to click on and Caleb stared at his eldest daughter. "Tell me, Kiki," he demanded.

Kirsten winced a bit at the persistent nickname before continuing, "Ryan is my son. We found out before Christmukkah. Nearly 18 years ago, before I ever met Sandy, I had a child."

"With Jimmy?" he asked, hoping to clarify.

"No, someone else. A man named Larry. He didn't treat me too well and I was worried about dragging a newborn baby into a potentially dangerous situation. So I gave him up for adoption."

Caleb nodded, gesturing for his daughter to continue. She wrung her hands tightly, her blue eyes -so much like her mother's, so much like those of the boy in the next room- fixed on her son. "When Ryan first got sick, Sandy went to see his brother, Trey. Trey confessed that Ryan had been adopted. Sandy took a leave of absence from the firm and threw his whole time into trying to find Ryan's adoptive parents. Before Christmukkah, he was finally able to cut through the last of the red tape and got a hold of Ryan's original adoption file. My name and signature was scrawled across the page which gave him up. He's my son."

Caleb stared at his daughter, before moving out of the kitchen. Worried about her father's reaction, Kirsten scrambled after him into the living room. Caleb stopped in front of the couch and stared down at the boy. Reaching out, he touched the top of Ryan's head very gently. Ryan stirred slightly and blinked, gazing up at Caleb, somewhere between asleep and awake. Those eyes -his wife's eyes- watching him so balefully, were what did Caleb in. He'd seen that exact look many times during her illness. Dropping to his knees, he pulled the sleepy teenager into his arms. Ryan, still half-asleep, didn't even bat an eye. He just snuggled closer, murmuring, "Ni' Gran'pa," before fading away again.

Kirsten and Sandy had learned, mostly by default, that when Ryan was still mostly asleep, he was at his most uninhibited. Ryan had confessed not long after he found out who his biological mother was that he want to end the war and get to know his grandfather, though he was worried that The Old Man, as he jokingly referred to Caleb, wouldn't accept him. This and his exhaustion were just about the only things that could explain his acceptance for this man who had done nothing but cut him down. Caleb looked up at his daughter. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Bring Seth home. That's about it. He's going through chemotherapy and radiation therapy. He's getting transfusions for his anemia. There's not much else to be done unless he can get a bone marrow transplant. And Seth seems to be our only hope of that fact."

Caleb rubbed a hand over the boy's topknot, letting him recline back on the couch again. "How much longer?"

"Until Seth gets home? Or until Ryan's body just gives out?"

"Either. Both."

"I don't know. Seth won't return our phone calls. We've left messages, but they finally just stopped taking them. We never got to tell him that Ryan was back. And Ryan's stubborn; it comes with the Nichol gene. He'll fight this for as long as he can. But Dr. Reynolds says it should only be a couple years. Eventually, all the fighting in the world isn't going to do him any good at all."

Caleb nodded and kissed his daughter's forehead. "I don't know how long it'll take me, but I'll do everything I can to bring him home, Kiki. And I'll try to get along with the boy." Looking down at his peaceful features, Caleb murmured, "He is, after all, my grandson."

And with that he turned and left. Sandy was coming as he was going out. "Hello, Cal," Sandy greeted.

Sandy stopped in shock when all he got was a small nod. There wasn't a single snide comment made. Caleb shut the door on his way out and Sandy turned to his wife. "Who was that? And what has he done to Caleb?"

Kirsten was in tears. Sandy rushed over, and pulled her into his arms. "What's wrong? What happened? What did he say?"

"He's going to start trying to be nice to Ryan. And he's going to try to bring Seth home, for Ryan's sake." Looking up at her husband, she inquired, "Could someone please tell me what planet I'm on?"

Sandy wasn't so sure himself. "What made him change his mind?"

"Ryan has my mother's eyes. I'd never noticed, but Dad loved Mom very much and always said that her eyes were the most beautiful part of her. Her eyes are looking out from Ryan's face and Dad immediately crumbled to their superior might."

Sandy smiled. "The man's got a soft spot after all. Well, Hell."

Another couple weeks later, Caleb had just about given up on his youngest grandson. Nothing he said seemed to convince the boy to call home. Finally, he flew there. There was avoidance and a huge fight, before Seth finally just disappeared. Forced to concede defeat, Caleb returned home. He arrived at his daughter, hating how the desperately hopeful look on her face fell almost immediately at the look in his eyes. "He's not coming."

It wasn't a question. Caleb shook his head and gathered his daughter close as she burst into tears. His hands stroked up and down her back, as she cried. "I'm so sorry, Kiki. I tried."

"I know, Dad. I know. Come on, Ryan's actually awake today. Maybe you can start to repair the bridges you both have been burning since he came."

For the first time in his life, he felt fear. Though he was willing to be nice, he wasn't so sure he wanted to get to know the boy personally. Kirsten took his arm and looked up at him. "Please, Dad. Ryan just wants to get to know his grandfather."

"Why?"

"Sandy asked him that too. Ryan said the world seems different, now that he's not sure he'll stay in it. He told Sandy that when you're sick, little things -grudges, jealousy, hatred- they don't seem important anymore. All that matters is your family, and whether or not they're there when you need them." Practically pleading with her father, she begged, "You're his grandfather. Please?"

Caleb nodded and took a deep breath, before entering the boy's room alone. Ryan looked up at him from the bed, his eyebrows furrowed. "Mr. Nichol?"

Caleb, remembering when the boy had called him "Grandpa," couldn't resist the remark, "So we're back to 'Mr. Nichol' again?"

Ryan shook his head, confused. "I don't understand. Where else would we be? I don't want to upset you."

"Grandpa."

Startled, Ryan looked up at the man in front of him and saw the knowledge in his eyes. Smiling a bit, he leaned back against his pillows as Caleb took a seat in his desk chair beside the bed. Ryan's head rested back against the headboard as he nodded. "Yeah. I think I can do that."

Caleb nodded once, smiling at him. "Good."

"So _Grandpa_, how's work?" Ryan cracked, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

Caleb cocked an eyebrow. "It was fine, _Grandson_, and your day?"

"Fine," Ryan answered, before he laughed. "This is never going to work."

Caleb moved to sit on the bed beside the ill boy, startling the teenager. Reaching up and placing a gentle hand on his head, he murmured in agreement, "Maybe not. But at least we can try."

Ryan's eyes shimmered with unshed tears at the acceptance he saw in his grandfather's eyes. "Okay….I can try."


	12. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: First of all, I'm so sorry for the extended wait! I have been so busy. And I have missed you all like crazy. First there were finals at the university. Then there was my grandmother's impromptu arrival. And then there was the aftermath of "The Nana." (Sorry, bad pun!)It's been an interesting couple of weeks. But, it's over now and I'm back in the groove. And now onto Kindly Words for my Kindly Reviewers.

OthfanAnna: Welcome to the Party! Here's more. I hope you like it.

cissi: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like it.

oc-journey06: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like the ideas. I thought they worked for the idea. I'm glad you like my Ryan. I wanted him to be more open with the Cohens. He's their son. He should start acting like it. And yes, there will be more Caleb/Ryan bonding later in the story. I hope you continue to read and enjoy.

Elebridith: Here's the answer to that question: Seth doesn't know. You'll learn why in this chapter. And yes, eventually, Ryan and Caleb will get there.

Marybeth: I'm glad you like my Caleb. And no, he's not such a bad guy. I was sad to learn that his character died on the OC. And I might use his heartattack in my story. Just an idea. And Seth is going to make his first appearance today. I hope you like it.

Cynthia: In this story, yea. He really is selfish. In the show, he's just a bit self involved.

Dumbeblondi02: Welcome to the Party! I love your name. I can totally commiserate! I was actually born blond which allows for lots of barbs. Oh well. I'm glad you like the chapter. Seth makes his first appearance today. I hope you like.

Babak: My lover! You're so awesome. I hope you continue to read and enjoy. I'm glad you liked the interaction between Ryan and Caleb. And yeah, I thought that Ryan needed something about himself that would remind Caleb of the person he loved more than life. I thought his eyes, since Kirsten is also blue-eyed, would be the way to go. I hope you continue to enjoy this story.

jhhhhjfjk89: I'm glad you caught the point of the chapter. I hope you continue to enjoy.

Gator-Girl: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like it.

SeattleJava: Welcome to the Party! Don't break a nail. That hurts. I hope you like this chapter.

Chapter 11: Seth

Grandfather and grandson managed to talk peaceably for nearly two hours, before Ryan could no longer fight sleep. Caleb smoothed a hand over the boy's head, watching his eyes flutter in an attempt to remain awake. Sensing the Caleb himself was the reason Ryan didn't want to sleep, Caleb smiled. "It's all right, Ryan. Go to sleep. I'll see you later."

Ryan nodded, looking up at his grandfather. "Why didn't Seth come home when you told him about my illness?"

Caleb shook his head. "I didn't tell him."

Ryan's eyes widened in surprise, but he was too tired to question. His eyes finally drifted shut and he slipped away into unconsciousness. Standing, Caleb pulled the blankets at the base of the bed over the boy's slumbering figure. Leaving the room, he joined his daughter in the kitchen. She and Sandy were there together, talking quietly. "Kiki," Caleb murmured, watching her cry against her husband's chest.

Kirsten looked up at her father. "Why isn't he here? He would have come running if he knew that Ryan was sick."

"I didn't get to tell him that Ryan was sick. He wouldn't listen to anything I tried to tell him. I tried to get him to call Ryan, but he wouldn't do it. All he would say was that Ryan didn't need him when he left, he didn't need him now."

Sandy stared at his father-in-law. "He still doesn't know that Ryan has cancer?"

Caleb shook his head sadly. "No, he still doesn't know."

Kirsten moaned. "Someone has to tell Seth that Ryan is sick. He needs to know."

Caleb shook his head. "He left the hotel he was staying at. I don't know where he disappeared to."

Kirsten looked outside toward the pool, the ocean and not for the first time, wished she hadn't allowed her youngest son to convince her to buy him a sailboat. "This is all my fault."

Caleb cocked an eyebrow at his daughter, "And how would this be your fault?"

"I'm a terrible mother."

Sandy shook his head, holding his wife close. "No, you're not. You're a good mother. Just because Seth doesn't understand that, doesn't mean that Ryan doesn't."

"And look at what a good mother I was to Ryan. I gave him up and let him get dumped in a family like the Atwoods."

Caleb shook his head. "You did what you thought would be best for him, Kiki. There's nothing wrong with that. You didn't know that he'd get adopted by the Atwoods. Or that he'd grow up like he did. When you gave him up, you only wanted the best for him. What you knew you couldn't give him at the time. You're not a bad mother."

The phone rang just then, startling the three adults silly. Kirsten reached for it shakily and wiped her eyes quickly, before answering the phone. "Hello?"

Seth's voice came over the receiver. "Can I speak to Ryan?"

Kirsten's heart wilted a little at the detached sound in her son's voice. "Ryan's sleeping, Seth. He hasn't been feeling well."

Seth immediately sounded concerned, though slightly suspicious, "What's wrong with him?"

"I can't tell you."

"You can't tell me? Why not? Did he tell you not to?" he exploded, seeing red. He'd always thought that Ryan had a temper, but little did he realize that he had inherited the same temper from his grandfather. Ryan's just manifested itself more often than his.

Kirsten sensed that this conversation was going downhill fast. "No, Seth, it's something Ryan should tell you himself."

Seth didn't even hear her, just plowing over her. "I told Grandpa he didn't need me. I mean I'm just Seth, the guy he can ditch at any given moment."

Kirsten, moving to tell Seth about Ryan's true parentage, gasped at the sound of the dial-tone. "Oh god," she murmured, her knees buckling as she fell to the floor. Sandy and Caleb rushed to hold her. "He hung up! He won't listen to anybody."

Everyone looked up as Ryan's voice asked tiredly from the doorframe, "Mom? What's going on?"

Kirsten looked up, and seeing the fear and exhaustion in his eyes that Ryan would only let her see, she stood and came to stand beside him. Ryan leaned gratefully into her arms, struggling to regain his breath as he heaved in air. "That was Seth on the phone, baby. I didn't know you were awake or I would have let you talk to him."

"I just woke up. I wasn't feeling well a second ago. What did he call about?"

"Your grandfather told him to call you. He was just doing that. I thought you should tell Seth about your illness yourself, and I tried to tell him that, but he wouldn't listen to me."

"So he still doesn't know?" Ryan asked, his eyes starting to see his future stretched out in front of him.

"No, Ryan. He still doesn't know you're his brother and he still doesn't know that you have cancer. Baby, I'm so sorry."

Ryan looked up at his mother. "Don't be. It's not your fault. He'll forgive me for leaving eventually. I just have to be patient." Taking a deep breath, he released it in a tragic sounding sigh. "Momma?"

Kirsten felt him start to tremble and started to lower them both to the floor. Sitting back against the wall with him in her arms and both Sandy and Caleb kneeling next to them, she looked down at him. "What's wrong, honey? Are you hurting?"

Ryan shook his head, before lifting tortured blue eyes to his mother's own. "I'm going to die. Aren't I?"

Kirsten's eyes flashed to Sandy's, her blue eyes begging him to answer this. Sandy watched the pain and heartache flash in the blue eyes that were so much like Ryan's. Reaching forward, Sandy laid a gentle hand on the curve of Ryan's shoulder. "No, Ryan. You're not going to die. You'll be fine. I don't know how long it'll take for you to be healthy again, but you'll be fine. You have my word."

Ryan nodded once, settling against his mother with a heavy sigh. Catching Sandy's chocolate eyes with his own mosaic-opals, he gave a small smile. Allowing his eyes to slip closed, he remarked tiredly, "I believe you."

Kirsten sobbed as she felt him go limp against her, holding his frail body tightly to her. Her fingers threaded through his hair fondly, almost absent in their lazy caress. Her cheek rested against his temple and she rocked him in her arms, murmuring senseless words against his pale skin, trying to comfort herself as much as him. Sandy, seeing that his wife was broken, reached out and carefully pulled Ryan from her arms. Kirsten shook her head fiercely, tightening her grip on her eldest son. "No!"

Sandy paused, speaking gently, "Kirsten. He's asleep. I just need to take him back to bed. All right? I'm just going to carry him down the hall."

Kirsten, realizing that she had went slightly crazy just then, nodded and released Ryan into Sandy's arms. Sandy hefted the seventeen year old into his arms and walked away, Kirsten following close on his heels. After the teenager was safely asleep in his own bed, Kirsten plopped into the chair there and sat. Her eyes stared at his face, almost as though she was trying to reassure herself that he was still breathing. Sandy, knowing that she wouldn't be moved, only kissed her forehead and left, leaving his wife in silence, staring at the pale features of his step-son.


	13. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: I apologize for my tardiness in updating this. But, seeing as school is out, I will not longer have easy access to a Internet compatible computer. My mother is always on, and my own laptop doesn't get the Internet. So, I apologize in advance. This by no stretch means that this story is discontinued. It will simply be delayed from time to time. I hope you continue to read and enjoy.

And now, Kindly words for my Kindly reviewers.

Nina: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like this story. We're getting close to the end. I hope. I hope you like this chapter.

Ryan and Marissa 4Ever: Welcome to the Party! I hope you like this chapter.

jhhhhjfjk89: I hope you like this chapter.

Babak: Hey sweetheart! How do you rate, both of your stories in one night. I hope you like. And I hope you like how this chapter plays out. The paths of the Cohen brothers finally coincide again.

oc-journey06: I'm glad you love this story. And I'm glad you like Caleb.

Cynthia: I'm glad you like Kirsten.

J: I'm sorry! This was the soonest I could update and still be happy with the chapter. It was not making me happy. I hope you like this chapter, though. And you continue to read.

Leentje: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like this story. I'm glad you like the fact that Ryan is Kirsten's son. And I'm glad you like the Strays. And don't worry about the mistake. At least you liked it both times, right?

Dumbeblondi02: I hope you like this chapter.

SeattleJava: I'm glad your nails didn't suffer too badly. And Ryan won't die….I don't think. Keep reading and find out.

JenJenxx: I'm sorry I made you cry! That wasn't my intention…okay, actually it was. Still, I'm sorry about that.

Chapter 12: Getting Sick

The day of Harbor's graduation, Ryan was in the hospital with a serious infection. The first day of college, Ryan was so weak he couldn't leave his bed. Thanksgiving came and went, with Ryan throwing up everything his doctors tried to get him to eat. Then the Cohen holiday, Christmukkah was upon them again. Seth hadn't called back since the first time. And the credit card had no new charges on it either. There was no way to track down the illusive young Cohen.

And somehow, Ryan knew that something was going to go wrong with yet another holiday.

Luke helped a now 18-year-old Ryan come down the stairs and into the den. He wore a pair of jeans and a tee shirt, with a grey baseball hat on backwards hiding his baldness. The anemia was controlled by the biweekly transfusions, just one more thing Ryan had to put up with. His body was pretty wasted, though his weight stayed mostly stable.

Luke sat the exhausted teenager onto the couch and sat on the floor, Anna insinuating herself into his lap without permission. Kirsten covered Ryan's shivering form with a blanket. Smoothing her hand over his head, she asked quietly, "Better?"

It wasn't but Ryan nodded anyway. "Yeah."

Gripping his chin in a gentle grip, Kirsten looked deep into his eyes. Shaking her head at his stubbornness, she went to get some more blankets, spreading those across him too. Ryan smiled. His mother could read him like a book. Ryan laid back and looked around.

The tree was beautiful and the presents were piled to the ceiling. Caleb and Julie were on their way, filling Ryan with equal parts excitement and dread, respectively. Jimmy and Hailey had been invited but had decided to go and see Jimmy's parents this year, leaving Marissa to come on her own. Caleb and Julie would swing by and pick her up on their way. Summer's dad had business out of town, so she would be attending their Christmukkah celebration as well. The doorbell rang and Sandy went to answer it. Caleb and Julie stood behind a smiling Marissa. "Hey guys. Come on in."

Marissa did as instructed, taking Sandy's arm and asking, "How is he today?"

"I don't know. Ask Kirsten. He's more willing to tell her how he's feeling."

Marissa nodded and went running to find her step-sister. "Kirsten!"

Kirsten smiled at the younger girl. "He's okay for now. I think he's starting to feel weird, but he's out of his room. And he's on the couch. Which is more than I can say for the last year."

Marissa nodded and ran toward the den. She leaped over the back of the couch and landed on top of Ryan, hands on each side of his body to brace her fall. "Hi baby." She greeted him, lips meeting his in a languid kiss.

He kissed her for a moment, before pulling back to catch his breath. He panted heavily, before greeting her breathlessly, "Hi Rissa. And how are you?"

Marissa, though worried, didn't call him on it. "I've never been better. And you?"

"Tired, but when is that anything new?" Ryan chuckled, pulling his girlfriend close to his heart, arms wrapped loosely around her back.

"Summer's going to be here soon. And she's going to want a spot on the couch with her brother."

"There's plenty of room for all three of us." Ryan said with a smile and another kiss.

Caleb came in and rubbed Ryan's head. Ryan looked up and smiled at the older man. "Hey Grandpa." He said.

Caleb smiled back. Since Caleb had learned of Ryan's parentage, the teenager been creeping into Caleb's heart and taking up permanent residence there. And the fact that he was more interested in architecture than even Caleb himself cinched it. The boy was a Nichol. "Hello Ryan. How are you feeling?"

"Sick. Tired. Sore. But as I told Marissa, that's nothing new."

"Good. I hope you start to feel better. I want to see my grandson play soccer at least once."

Ryan smiled and snuggled Marissa closer. Summer arrived next and joined the other two on the couch. Luke and Anna laughed at the three of them. Ryan turned onto his back, one girl laying on each side, Marissa against the back and Summer on the edge. Fortunately, Kirsten had gotten a newer wider couch for just that reason. "It's the inseparable Three Musketeers!" Anna laughed, holding tightly to Luke behind her.

Luke just chuckled along. "How do you rate man? You've got two gorgeous women and I only have one."

Anna smacked his arm and the other two girls laughed. Ryan just shrugged. "Just that damn good I guess."

Kirsten scolded from the kitchen, shouting, "Ryan!"

Ryan grimaced and ducked his head. "Sorry!"

"You're going to be sorry when you're grounded because of that mouth of yours."

"I'm already grounded. Involuntary of course."

"Yeah, well let's see how you like it, if I lock you in your room and you can't have any visitors."

Ryan's face scrunched up in horror. "All right! I'll be good!"

"You'd better be. Did you call the Strays?"

"Ben called this morning."

"Good, then let the presents begin."

Since Seth wasn't there that year again, Sandy was the one handing out the presents for the second year in a row. As the morning wore on, Ryan got more and more tired. Marissa brushed a hand over his forehead and drew back in alarm. "Ryan?" she asked, sounding concerned.

Kirsten was there at Ryan's side in an instant. "Honey? Are you feeling okay?"

Ryan shook his head, eyes plaintive, giving him the look of a very young boy. "No. I don' feel good. Hot and sticky."

Marissa took her step-sister's hand and placed it on Ryan's head. "You're really warm, baby. Sandy, go get the thermometer."

Luke displaced Anna and waved Sandy back. "I've got it."

Sandy nodded as Luke dashed for the classic thermometer in the pool house. A second later, he was back handing the thermometer to Kirsten. "All right, Ry, under the tongue. There you go."

Ryan laid still, thermometer firmly under his tongue. Marissa reached up, pulling the cap off and trailing her fingers over his head. Ryan buried his head in her chest, blinking slowly with fatigue. When the thermometer beeped, Kirsten took it and checked it. Her eyes widened and her mouth compressed. She turned over her shoulder, meeting Sandy's eyes sadly, "He's got a fever."

Sandy came over and lifted Ryan off the couch. "Let's get him to the hospital."

The doorbell rang and Kirsten waved Luke toward it. "Could you get it, Luke?"

"Yeah. You go with him. I'll take the girls."

"Thank you." Kirsten said, following Sandy out the garage. Sandy laid a warmly covered Ryan in the backseat, climbed into the passenger seat and then sat back as Kirsten drove toward the hospital.

Luke opened the door, just as the Range Rover was disappearing from the driveway. Julie was trying to comfort her sobbing daughter and Anna was comforting a distraught Summer. Luke turned away from the scene behind him and turned to look at the visitor.

There stood Seth Cohen, in all his glory. Wild hair and all.

Luke and Seth stared for a minute before Luke swung, his fist connecting with Seth's jaw with a satisfying crack. Anna released a suddenly furious Summer and dashed to prevent her boyfriend from doing any more damage than he'd already done. "Luke! Ryan is going to kill you!"

"If he manages to survive his most recent setback."

Summer stomped over to Seth and slapped him hard. "What is this? Why do you all keep hitting me?" Seth demanded, looking furious. "I've been away and this is the kind of hello I get?"

Luke's face turned murderous and he drew his arm back again. Seeing his intent, Anna grabbed her boyfriend's arm, keeping him at her side. "Luke, go to Ryan's room and pack him a bag. He's going to need it, just like he always does. And while you're doing that, I need to call the Mavericks. Maybe one of them is sick and Ryan caught it from them."

Luke nodded and followed Anna's insistent tugs on his arm. Marissa followed them, knowing what Ryan would feel most comfortable in during his stay at the hospital, as well as what he would like while he was there. Summer was still glaring at Seth, brimming with anger at her ex-boyfriend. "How could you?"

"How could I what? I'm back aren't I?"

"A little late. Ryan needed you."

"He didn't need me when he left."

Summer glared, one of her infamous rage blackouts broiling under the surface. "Ryan has cancer, Seth. Leukemia. He's had it since last August. He wanted to be the one to tell you, but right now he's so sick, I think I should just forgo the formality."

Seth's face drained of all color. "Ryan's got Leukemia?"

"Yeah, Seth. Leukemia. The kind of sick that can kill you. And you've been gone!"

Luke came down the hallway with a duffel bag over his shoulder. "Why does he keep getting sick again?" he asked Marissa.

"His immune system is shot. He's more susceptible to colds and other bugs going around than the rest of us. And even if it's something little for us, for Ryan, it could be devastating. And he just had chemo yesterday morning, as well as radiation this morning, before we all came." Marissa explained, following Luke to his truck.

Anna came running from the kitchen. "Jesse is fighting the flu. Anka just found out this afternoon. She called, before I could to the phone, to warn us. We have to tell Kirsten. He's going to have to be isolated again." Anna grabbed Summer's arm on their way past. "Come on, Sum. Ryan needs us."

Summer nodded and followed Anna to Luke's truck. Seth stared after the four before turning to face his grandfather. "Grandpa, please explain what is going on?"

"In the car. We need to go to the hospital. Your mom is going to want to see you again."

Seth nodded and followed his grandfather and Julie to their car. When they arrived at the hospital, they already had Ryan in ICU as well as in isolation until they could pin the source of the fever. Kirsten, as his mother, was the only one allowed to be back there. Sandy was sipping on a cup of coffee when Seth came in. He spit his coffee back into the cup, staring at the apparition in front of him. "Seth?"

Seth nodded. Sandy set the coffee cup down and came over to his son, throwing his arms around the tall and gangly form of his son. Taking his face in both hands, he looked at his son long and hard. "It's good to have you back. And you'll be getting reacquainted with the house. You're grounded until next year."

"But I'm 17!" Seth protested.

"I know, you'll be grounded for your 18th birthday. Let me go get your mother. She's in with Ryan. He's in isolation."

Caleb came over and touched Sandy's arm. "How is he?"

"They hit him hard with all kinds of medications; antibiotics and some more red blood cells. Tons of stuff. They say he'll pull through, but it's touch and go for awhile until he stabilizes."

"You know he's in our prayers."

"I know. Today of all days he had to get sick."

Caleb nodded sadly and let Sandy disappear through the huge double doors behind them. Sandy pulled Kirsten from Ryan's room and told her his news. "Kirsten, Seth's back."

Kirsten nodded, swallowing hard before turning back toward her oldest, looking so small and vulnerable in his bed. "Okay. Ground him for a year and I'll see him when I can leave Ryan."

Sandy nodded, having expected this answer. Kirsten was obsessive about Ryan's health. He knew she was just trying to make up for the years when Kirsten hadn't had him for her own. "Anything you want me to tell him?"

"I love him. And he's in big trouble. Oh, and get him tested. See if he's a close enough match."

Sandy nodded and left again. Kirsten came into Ryan's room. The doctors had sedated him and so for the moment, Ryan slept peacefully.

Ryan grew more and more restless as the fever got higher and higher. He tossed and turned, screaming out the horror of his nightmares. They had to restrain him and Kirsten whispered in his ear trying to let her son know that she was there with him.

Sometime around midnight, the Strays -minus Jesse- ran into the hospital. Ben skidded to a stop beside Summer. Looking up at him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and started to cry. Ben rubbed his hands over her back, hoping to soothe her tears.

The following morning, the fever started to go down and Ryan woke up on his own. His eyes blinked a couple times and he looked at Kirsten sleepily. "Back in the ICU huh?"

"Yeah. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. What did I say?"

"Nothing I'm going to tell. Seth's back."

Ryan smiled tiredly, letting his eyes slip shut. "Really? Remind me to punch his lights out."

Kirsten stroked his head gently, smiling at him. "From what I heard, Luke already did that. A beautiful shiner, right on his jaw."

Ryan chuckled, before his shoulders arched as his chuckles turned to coughs. Kirsten lifted him up to help clear his airways, before letting him swallow some water when the coughing died down. Ryan nodded his thanks, before speaking. "Really? I would've liked to have seen that."

"I'm sure Luke'll reenact it for you."

"Where am I?"

"Where are you usually? Isolation."

"I thought you said I wasn't grounded." He whispered, his eyes sliding closed and sleep claiming him again.

"I know baby. But this kind of grounding, I don't have any control over." She murmured, kissing his head gently, before repositioning the mask back over her nose and mouth.


	14. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: I'm sorry. It's been a while since I could get to the computer. If I get at least ten reviews, I'll try to add more tonight. Kindly words for my kindly reviewers.

Dumbeblondi02: Soon, I promise. Enjoy.

Babak: this is going to be a heart-wrenching chapter. I hope you enjoy.

Jhhhhjfjk89: I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Callie-Cat: Welcome to the Party! I'm glad you like this. Keep reading, okay? Enjoy.

I-Believe-In-The-Butterflies: Welcome to the Party! I like your penname. I hope you continue to reading. Enjoy.

JenJenxx: I'm glad you liked it. Enjoy.

OthfanAnna: here's More.

Leentje: I'm glad you liked this. Keep reading, okay? Sorry I didn't post any sooner. I tried.

SeattleJava: You can stop screaming now, sweetie! I promise. Enjoy.

Chapter 14: Bad News

Dr. Reynolds came to Ryan's room later the next day. Ryan was still in isolation, the flu-bug he'd caught from Jesse having morphed into an infection that was raging through his weakened body unchecked. "Kirsten? Could I talk to you and your husband in the waiting room?"

Kirsten glanced at her son, satisfied to see him sleeping. She nodded, kissing his forehead once before leaving the room. She moved to the nurse's station, pulling off the protective coverings before following Ryan's oncologist to the waiting room. The Mavericks, minus Jesse and Anka, had joined the group in the waiting room, sitting with the girls, Luke and Anna to keep Marissa and Summer calm. Everyone stood as the two entered the room. "What's going on?"

"I have both good news and bad news. Your youngest son, Seth, is a match for Ryan."

Kirsten was still looking at Reynolds, seeing the shadows in his eyes as the rest of the room celebrated. "That's the good news. What's the bad news?"

"If we try to operate now, we'll lose him."

Kirsten stumbled backwards, groping for a chair. Nathan and Ben lunged forward, grabbing her arms gently and helping her to a chair. "What? I don't understand?"

"The infection is doing too much damage. Nothing we throw at it, is giving it pause. He's just too weak. There's nothing we can do."

"What about chemo? Radiation?"

"He had a violent backlash to the radiation. And he's already sick; the chemo would only make it worse. We're trying everything we know, but you need to realize, we could lose him."

Kirsten nodded, staring at Sandy in shock and horror as her husband knelt on the ground in front of her. "Sandy? Make this better," she begged him, her eyes brimming with tears.

Sandy shook his head. "I can't." He swallowed hard and spoke again, "Kirsten, I can't."

"NO!" she screamed, collapsing forward into his arms.

At the sound of Kirsten's utter heartbreak, Summer, Marissa and Anna collapsed as well. Anna sought Luke's comfort, while Summer leaned on the twins and Marissa turned to Aidan. Caleb moved to Sandy's side, both men comforting the blond as much as they could. Kirsten and Ryan had grown very close since Ryan's diagnosis. Kirsten had stuck to her son's side like glue, becoming the mother Ryan should have had in childhood. To hear that she had only just found her son, and was about to lose him, there was nothing that broke her heart more.

Seth looked at his family that was scattered around the waiting room. He felt like an outsider. Drifting away, he moved down the hallway toward Ryan's room. He knew he couldn't go in, but maybe he could see him through a window or something. The nurses directed him toward Ryan's room, each of them trying to warn him that the Ryan he was going to see was not the Ryan he remembered. Seth blew them off, insisting that Ryan Atwood was invincible.

But his first glance at Ryan, changed that opinion forever. Ryan was small, pale, in his hospital bed. There was an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth, and his chest heaved in the air in great gasps. His cheeks and nose were rosy with fever, though the skin beneath was as white as paper. Monitors and machines, tubes and wires, were all connected to him.

Ryan started to wake up, his eyes drifting open little by little. He looked around slowly, obviously looking for Kirsten. His baby blues hadn't changed much since Seth had left. They locked on him, staring at the sight of his younger brother. Seth shivered, recognizing that look. Ryan had shut-down at the sight of his former best friend. Nothing was ever going to be same again. It wasn't much longer before Ryan couldn't stay awake anymore, slipping back into unconsciousness as easily as though he'd never been awake.

Seth shuddered slightly, heading back to the waiting room. "What's going on? Why did you all test me for a match for Ryan?"

Kirsten and Sandy looked at each other. They had been waiting for Ryan to get better so that Ryan could tell Seth what was going on. But Ryan was too weak, and the stress of seeing Seth would probably force the older boy into a major setback. Kirsten pulled out her wallet and flipped open to Ryan's baby picture. "Do you know who this is?"

"No. I've never seen that picture before. Who is it?"

"That's Ryan. The day he was born. The nurses gave me a copy of the picture they took, after I signed away the rights to him," Kirsten started, taking the picture back and tracing the pudgy lines of cheek and chin. "He was a beautiful baby; bright blue eyes and as gentle as could be."

Looking up at her youngest, her eyes filled with tears again, "Eighteen years ago, I gave up a son. Three years ago, my youngest brought him home. Seth, Ryan is my son. The son I gave up for adoption when he was only a baby. You're his half-brother."

Seth dropped into his chair, staring at his mother in shock and surprise. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Ryan wanted to be the one to tell you. And after you got angry at him, you didn't call back. We couldn't find you anywhere. Ryan needed to be the one to tell you."

Seth looked at the floor. "Does he know?"

"Yeah. He knew after Sandy did. Your grandfather found out next. That's why he went to see you, in Tahiti. Because he knew that Ryan needed you."

Seth got up and moved toward the windows. "And I was so self-absorbed, that I couldn't be bothered."

Kirsten sighed, realizing that Seth was feeling very guilty about everything. "Ryan's going to get better. Sandy and I promised him. I don't know when, Seth, but he is. He's held out for this long. He can't leave us now."

Seth nodded, watching his mother curl back up against his father, tears streaming in diamond rivers down her cheeks. "How long until the leukemia kills him?"

"They gave him three years after diagnosis, without treatment. It's been almost two years. He's hanging on. But he needs the transplant. It's his best hope."

Seth nodded again, before closing off and standing apart. "I'm sorry, Mom. I never would have stayed away if I'd known."

"I know that, sweetie. And Ryan will too. But he's angry and he's hurt and I don't know when he'll forgive you. I just hope he makes it through this, so that you can forgive each other."

That statement reminded Seth of why he'd left in the first place. "What happened with Theresa?"

"She gave up the baby for adoption and went to Atlanta. And after she left, Ryan came home to us. He was diagnosed later that fall. And it's been an uphill battle since then."

Days passed and Ryan seemed to get progressively worse. Finally, Dr. Reynolds came bursting into the waiting room where the entire Cohen family waited, along with the Mavericks and Anka. "We're losing him."


	15. Chapter 14

AN: I'm BAACK! I just returned home from Europe, and am enthusiastic about writing you all. I hope you enjoy the chapter. And so now, kindly words for my kindly reviewers.

JenJenxx: I hope you like this chapter.

Dumbeblondi02: I wouldn't do that! Or would I? Read and find out.

Babak: I'm glad you keep reading this. And, I'm glad you don't know what to expect. It makes my job easier as the writer to surprise you. I hope you like this. No, Theresa was pregnant and Ryan went back to Chino –where he grew up- to help her raise the baby. When the baby was born, Theresa decided she couldn't keep it or keep Ryan. So she gave it up for adoption. The baby belonged to Theresa's ex-boyfriend, Eddie. I hope that helped my lovely. Keep reading, okay?

Kursk: Welcome to the party! That's an interesting pen name. And I'm glad you have now discovered it. I've been away, so I hope you like this chapter. And I hope you Summer and Seth get back together too. They're perfect for each other. Keep reading, okay?

Katwoman76: Welcome to the party! And you're right, everyone was being stubborn about telling Seth. Stubborn is a Nichol gene, and Ryan is a Nichol. He wanted to tell Seth and he wouldn't have forgiven anyone who would have violated his trust like that.. The Cohens didn't know if Ryan was going to make it to tell Seth, so Summer told him to make Seth feel guilty about what he'd said and done.

jhhhhjfjk89: I don't know. Will Ryan die? I hope you haven't started crying yet. I've been out of town, in Europe, with no internet. I wanted to update, I promise. I just couldn't. I hope you forgive me.

beachtree: Yes, the ending was evil. It's what I do best. I am the cliffhanger queen. I hope you like it. And yes, Seth always treats Ryan like his personal amusement park; Ryan's pretty patient with it, but still. And I don't know. How much do I make Ryan suffer? OR the Cohens, for that matter? You'll only be able to find out, if you keep reading.

Cynthia: I'm glad you liked this chapter. Keep reading, okay?

KikiCohen: Welcome to the party! I'm glad you like this story.

Leentje: I don't know. Will Ryan live through the night? You'll only find out if you keep reading.

Yes, I am evil-oh-well: Welcome to the party! I love this penname. I'm glad you liked it, and thank you for the compliment. I added the strays to be friends with Ryan. He needed friends who were there for him, who Seth could see interacting with him when he got back. Because, let's face it, Seth is a little selfish. And he doesn't usually treat Ryan very well. But that's a personal problem. So, I wanted someone who truly had Ryan's best interests at heart. And that's how the Strays were bon. I hope you like them better as the story continues.

I-Believe-In-The-Butterflies: Oh, oops! Well, hi J. Sorry about that. I'm glad you liked the chapter. And yes, I hope I get more computer time too.

tyger0103: Welcome to the party! Yes, he does need to punch Seth's lights out. But I don't know if Ryan's going to make it. You know? Keep reading and find out.

SophiaDaniela: Welcome to the party! It's been about a year and a half in their lives since the beginning of the story. Why?

Maria: Welcome to the party! Does Ryan live or die? That is the question. Keep reading and find out.

AgnesSophia: Welcome to the party! I think, unless you've reviewed before. It's been a while and it's late. I'm confused. I'm glad you like it. And keep reading, okay?

Chapter 14: Come Back

"Is there anything we can do?"

"Say your goodbyes. We've done all we can. It's up to him now. I'm sorry."

Kirsten nodded, brushing at her eyes and moving determinedly toward Ryan's room. She marched in and strode to her son's side. Looking down at him, she almost felt guilty about what she was about to do. Almost.

Reaching down, she shook Ryan's shoulder. Hard.

Ryan jerked, flinching at the rough treatment, before he blinked awake. "Momma?"

"You listen to me, Ryan Gabriel Atwood-Nichol-Cohen. You will get better, you understand me?"

Ryan slumped backward, every breath of air rattling in his throat. "Momma, I'm so tired."

"I know baby, I know you are. But you have to fight this. Okay? Seth's a match. You have to keep trying for a little while longer, so that you can have that transplant. You weren't brought back to me just so you could leave me again, Ryan. You have to fight."

"I don't know if I can," he murmured, eyes drifting closed again.

Marissa came up behind Kirsten, standing of his other side and taking his hands tightly in her own. "Ryan?"

Ryan's eyes flickered open and he smiled at her, "Rissa."

Marissa smiled at him sadly, squeezing his hands tighter. "I need you to make me a promise."

"I can't, Marissa."

Marissa's eyes hardened. "Yes you can. You can stay with us, Ryan. I know you can. I love you, so I know you can."

"I love you too," Ryan gasped, trying to squeeze her hands. "I don't want to fight anymore, Marissa. I'm too tired. I just want to sleep."

"If you love me, you'll fight this. We have so much we have to do, Ryan. I want a big white wedding, with you as the groom. And a dozen kids, with you as their father." By now, she was starting to cry and Ryan reached up slowly to brush away her tears. "You can't leave me, Ryan. I need you."

Seth arrived in the doorway, just as Summer approached his brother as well. "Come on, Chino. I'm feeling a rage blackout coming on. If you leave us, I'll resurrect your ass and then kill you myself. You're my brother, Ryan. You can't leave."

Ryan smiled slightly. "I think that's the first time you've ever called me Ryan."

Summer nodded. "I'll make you a promise. You stay with us, I won't call you Chino anymore, okay?"

Ryan held out a hand to her, "Shake on it?"

Summer took his hand in hers, pressing a kiss to his knuckles. "Shake on it. Come on, Ryan. You're the glue that holds us together. You can't leave. We need you."

Luke and Anna came next, each reaching to touch him. Seth stayed by the door, as the Mavericks also took their places around the bed. Luke squeezed his friend's leg lightly. "And besides, who's going to have my back when the new punk comes to town, huh? Welcome to the OC, Bitch. It wouldn't be the same if it wasn't you."

Ryan's eyes flickered to each of them. "I'll try. But I'm just tired."

"Try, Ryan. All we want is for you to try," Ben assured him, smiling at his best friend.

Ryan nodded, his eyes slipping closed, before he slipped into easy sleep. Nearly three hours later, while Ryan still slept and his friends remained clustered about his bed, Dr. Reynolds checked the monitors. "His blood pressure's stabilizing. His heartbeat's getting stronger. He might have turned the corner. If he keeps improving, we'll know for sure by tomorrow morning. With any luck, we can hit him with some radiation and eventually, operate."

Kirsten sobbed, dropping forward across her son's chest. "Thank you, Ryan," she murmured against his chest. "I knew you could do it."


	16. Chapter 15

AN: It's late. I'm tired. So I'm going to dispense with the usual Kindly words. I'll give extra next chapter. Kisses to all of my loyal and lovely reviewers. I miss you all.

Chapter 15: In the Hospital

A couple days later, Ryan was transferred out of the ICU and into his own room. Marissa claimed first rights to him. She peeked into his room and smiled at him. "Hey," she said, with a smile.

"Hey," he returned, blinking his eyes tiredly.

"How are you feeling?"

"The usual. They doubled my chemo this morning. But I have this catheter in, so I don't throw up. Well, I do, but it's complicated."

Marissa smiled, rolling her eyes. "I'm sure. Anna told me to tell you that you can't kill Luke for punching Seth. She thinks you'll listen to me."

"I won't kill Luke; it's what I would've done."

Marissa leaned forward, kissing his head. She pulled the messenger bag from her shoulder. "I brought you some stuff."

"Really? Like what?"

"Pictures, some clothes for when the doctors say you can wear them again. Just things to keep you amused."

"Thanks. Could you put up the pictures?"

"Sure thing baby." Marissa answered, kissing him quickly before putting up the pictures on the dresser and the nightstands. Right next to him, went up a picture of the four of them before Ryan and Seth left Newport that fateful summer. "What do you think? Better?"

Ryan nodded with a smile. "Yeah. Thanks."

"A couple weeks from now, you might be healthy again. No more chemo."

"That would be a welcome relief," he chuckled, before settling back against the pillows, "Could I see Seth?"

"Sure," she agreed immediately, before narrowing her eyes at him, "You promise not to kill him?"

"I need him alive, for the moment. So yeah, I promise not to kill him." Pausing he continued, "Yet."

Marissa smiled, kissing him quickly. "I wouldn't expect any less. After Seth, I'll send in Summer, okay? She's been worried sick about you."

"Thanks Marissa."

"Not a problem. You just concentrate on getting stronger. The sooner you're strong enough, the sooner they can do the transplant."

Ryan nodded and closed his eyes as Marissa left to go and get Seth. She entered the waiting room and stopped in front of him. "Ryan wants to see you. Do not upset him."

Seth nodded and left the room, headed toward Ryan's room. Ryan's eyes drifted open as Seth pushed open the door to his room. "Ryan? You wanted to see me?"

Ryan nodded, groping for the bed controls with his fingers. "Come here," he ordered, as Seth came into his line of sight. Seth looked away from the wasted sight of his best friend. Ryan's eyes caught the movement and he snapped harshly, "What, you can't stand seeing me sick?"

"No," Seth conceded, before explaining, "You're Ryan Atwood. You don't get sick. You told me so yourself."

"Actually, I'm Ryan **Nichol-Cohen**, and I am sick. Dr. Reynolds thinks I inherited it from our grandmother, Mom's mom."

"Oh." Seth said, studying his feet in fascination.

"Where were you?"

"Tahiti."

"Why didn't you call?"

Seth shrugged once, "I didn't want to."

Ryan nodded, blinking slowly. "Did you get Sandy's message?"

"I chose not to return the call. I didn't want to come home. I was so mad about you leaving." Pausing, he took a deep breath and then murmured, "Dad didn't tell me you were sick."

Ryan nodded, laughing bitterly. "Would that have made a difference?"

Seth flinched, and Ryan spoke again. "I didn't think so. You were my best friend, Seth, my little brother. I have always had your back. You promised me you would have mine. I don't think I can be your friend again. Not for awhile."

Seth flinched again. He knew Ryan would be angry, but he hadn't expected him to be this angry. "Ry…."

"No! You were my only hope for a cure! And you didn't want to come home!" Ryan shouted, before flopping back, breathing hard. His eyes squeezed shut in pain as his lungs protested the extra work they'd been doing. He blinked back tears as he tried to gulp in air. Alarms around his bed started to go off and a nurse ran in, followed by Dr. Reynolds. Reynolds came to the bed, pulling out a needle, checking for air-bubbles as he tried to calm his patient. "Ryan, you need to relax. You're making it worse."

Ryan shook his head, panting for breath. The nurse slipped pure oxygen over his nose and mouth, giving Ryan a lungful of the gas, easing the agony a little bit. Reynolds checked the monitors around his patient before turning to Seth. "You're going to have to leave. You're upsetting my patient, and his body can't handle it right now."

Seth nodded and turned toward the door. At the door, he turned back, watching the going-ons silently. Dr. Reynolds patted Ryan's shoulder. "We're going to need to give you another red blood-cell transfusion and then we're going to do a full body radiation therapy treatment. Get you as clean as we can before the bone marrow transplant. "

Ryan nodded, flinching as the needle slipped into the IV port and the sedative burned its way into his body. "Sorry." He whispered, voice hoarse.

"It's all right, Ryan. You want your mom?"

"Please," Ryan murmured, getting drowsy again.

"You got it. Take it easy. And don't take that mask off."

Ryan shook his head no and laid his head back on his pillow again, slipping into semi-consciousness almost effortlessly. Dr. Reynolds turned away, dropping the needle into the disposable box on the wall. Seth was gripping the door, watching Ryan sleep. "Can I help you?" Reynolds asked, taking his arm and guiding him from the room.

"Is he going to be okay?"

"Yeah. Thanks to you, his chances just got a lot better." Reynolds replied, patting his shoulder and disappearing down the hall. Seth felt guilt rise dark and overpowering from deep in his heart.

Seth went into the waiting room and dropped to his knees in front of his mother. Kirsten was drinking a cup of coffee and reading the paper. "Mom?"

Kirsten dropped the paper and looked at her prodigal son with a smile. "What is it, Seth? Are you okay?"

"I never would have stayed away if I'd known he was sick. You know that, right? Never."

"I know that. But I don't think Ryan does. He's very angry and he has every right to be. He's been doing this alone for the last year and a half. It's been hard. Chemo three days a week, radiation the other two days, every week. No breaks. No vacations. Just treatments and treatments and more treatments. Red blood cell transfusions, antibiotics, pills, more medication than any teenager should have to look at in a year. He had to stop playing soccer. He was team captain, all year, because they wouldn't cut him. But he couldn't play. He was too tired, too weak. He sat on the sidelines and cheered. His friends came back from Philadelphia and from Oregon so that they could be here and support him when he needed them. But the one person who should been here, his brother, wasn't there for him. And I think that's what hurts him the most."

Seth nodded and started to cry, hunching over and burying his face in his hands. Kirsten dropped to her knees in front of him and held him close. "Just be patient with him. Someday he'll forgive you. You just need to give him his space. And let him have time to forgive you."

Seth nodded and buried his face in his mother's shoulder. A few minutes later, Dr. Reynolds came to get Kirsten and take her to her son. Kirsten kissed Seth's temple, before going to tend to Ryan.


	17. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: Kindly words for my Kindly reviewers. Finally! Seeing as I haven't updated this story in forever. Sorry for the wait! I couldn't get this chapter to work out the way I wanted it to! I hope you like this one. It's almost done though. That should please -or disappoint- all of you.

Kirsten-B: Yes, Seth is back. I hope you continue to enjoy this story.

bexpunkd: Yes, sahib!

Babak: Hello sweetie! Again! I hope you continue to enjoy this story. And I'm glad you think my usage of medical terminology makes this story more real. And yes, I would think that Ryan would forgive him. They are brothers, and brothers tend to forgive each other for random bouts of stupidity. But I wouldn't be hasty!

jhhhhjfjk89: Hey, I'm sorry you've been crying so long. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

SeattleJava: I hope you like this. And don't bite your nails too much. There'll be nothing left of them.

J: I hope you like this story. And thanks. I'm glad I rock. It's what I live for.

CynthiaB: I'm glad you like that Ryan is angry with Seth. And yeah, it does seem very really, doesn't it? I hope you continue to read and enjoy.

katwoman76: I hope you like this chapter. They do address the role Ryan's pride played in this whole mess in this chapter. Briefly. But still. And yes, they are best friends. And yeah, Trey's done worse. I hope you enjoy. And thanks for the long review. I enjoyed it.

JenJenxx: I'm glad you could relate with where Ryan's coming from. I hope you continue to enjoy this story.

Leentje: Here's the chapter that you were asking for awhile back, when you emailed me. I hope you enjoy and continue to read.

kursk: I'm glad you like where I'm going with this. And we'll see what Summer has to say soon.

Chapter 16: Going Home…For the Moment

Dr. Reynolds slipped into Ryan's room later that week, smiling at the familiar sight there. Ryan lay on his side, stubbornly resisting sleep, as he and his mother talked. She reached up and caressed the planes of his face, kissing his cheek. "Go to sleep, Ryan. I'll see you in the morning."

Ryan nodded, squeezing her hand tighter. "Stay with me?" he asked plaintively.

"Always. Close your eyes," Kirsten instructed, running her fingers over the smooth curve of her son's skull.

Ryan fought sleep for a moment longer and looked up at Kirsten sadly. "Tell Seth I'm sorry for blowing up at him."

"Don't worry about it, baby. It was something Seth needed to hear. Although, to be honest, you are not entirely blameless."

Ryan smiled slightly, "Yeah. Me and my pride."

Kirsten kissed his head gently. "It's a Nichol thing. You'll get used to it. Get some sleep."

Ryan nodded, unable to fight unconsciousness any longer. Snuggling into his pillow, he closed his eyes and slipped away into the Land of Dreams. Kirsten sighed, kissing his head and fussing with his covers for a helpless minute. "Mrs. Cohen?" the doctor asked quietly, smiling slightly to see her jump, startled.

"Dr Reynolds," she sighed, obviously relieved. "I didn't hear you come in. Is something wrong?"

"No; could we talk outside? I don't want to risk waking him."

Kirsten nodded, smoothing the covers one last time, before following the oncologist into the hallway. Dr Reynolds smiled at her worried look and touched her arm gently. "Ryan is fine. He's progressing very well for having been so sick. Barring anything unforeseen popping up tonight, I think you can take him home tomorrow afternoon."

Kirsten's hands flew to her mouth. "Are you serious?"

"Absolutely. I know he hates it here. We can't perform the operation until he's well enough, and that's a few weeks away at least. Just keep a close eye on him. And keep his contact with people to a minimum. The last thing Ryan needs is a repeat of this disaster."

Kirsten nodded, grinning tearfully. "He's going to be so happy. He's been asking for days when he could go home."

"I don't doubt that in the least. If I were you, I'd try to keep his spirits up as much as possible. Finish your interrupted Christmas morning as soon as he gets home."

Kirsten shook the doctor's hand. "Thank you so much. I have to go call Sandy. Make sure he's here to pick us up tomorrow, and make sure Rosa has Ryan's room in some semblance of order."

He smiled and watched the blond woman scurry away to call her husband. Laughing lightly, he moved away to finish his rounds for the night and head home.

Sure enough, the following afternoon -after a lengthy examination- Ryan was released from the hospital. The only things that would have made going home better were being able to leave on his own two feet and the absence of his ever-present IV. The IV had been the only condition of going home Reynolds had insisted on, and even though Ryan hated it, he'd gladly put up with it if it meant he would be going home. Ryan glared at the tube in his arm now as Sandy rolled his wheelchair out to the Range Rover. Kirsten hung the IV bag on the clothes hook, before Sandy assisted the teenager into the backseat.

Pretty soon Ryan completely forgot about his IV as Sandy pulled out of the hospital parking lot and turned toward home. Kirsten turned in her seat, smiling at her son. "How you feeling, sweetie? Dr Reynolds told me you had chemo this morning."

"Kinda nauseous, but it comes and goes. I'm just happy to be going home," Ryan enthused with a grin.

Sandy chuckled. "I'll bet you are."

"I don't want to ever go back there." Ryan announced adamantly.

"Well, you'll want to go back eventually, Ryan. What about the transplant?" Kirsten teased, her eyes fond as she watched her son.

Ryan blushed pink, before admitting, "All right. One more time to the hospital," he said, allowing a wide yawn before finishing, "but that's it."

"You got it, baby. Tired?"

Ryan smiled wryly, letting his eyes drift closed, "Always."

Kirsten reached into the bag on the seat next to Ryan, pulling out a pillow and handing it to her son. "Here. Close your eyes and get some rest. We won't be home for awhile yet."

Ryan accepted the pillow gratefully, slipping it between him and the pillow. Laying his head against it, he yawned and fell into a light doze. Kirsten reached back and pulled a blanket over his form. "I'm so happy he's coming home, Sandy."

"You're not the only one. You called the kids? Make sure they're ready for us?"

"Called before we left the hospital."

"Good. Well, Mrs. Cohen, sit back and enjoy the ride. There's nothing else to do."

Kirsten smiled and linked her hand with her husband's, watching the scenery pass them by.

Luke and Anna were waiting at the door when the SUV pulled into the driveway. Coming forward, Luke opened the door slowly, bracing Ryan's head as his body followed the door. Ryan woke blearily at the shift, glaring at Luke fuzzily. "Man, I was sleeping here."

"Sorry, dude. But the gang's all inside. They're waiting for you."

Ryan nodded, unbuckling himself and accepting Luke and Anna's shoulders as he staggered from the car. Anna reached to get the IV bag, before the three teens lead the way to the door. Sandy grabbed Ryan's duffle bag, linking his hand with his wife's and following them inside.

Ryan's whole face lit up with a smile as Marissa approached him, kissing him fiercely. Taking Anna's place under his arm, she helped him into the kitchen. There was a banner strung the whole way across the room that read, "Welcome Home, Ryan!" with all of his friends congregated underneath it. "Surprise!" they shouting, rushing at him.

Ryan accepted their welcome homes, before sitting down, breathing hard. "Thanks guys," he panted, causing Marissa and Kirsten to exchange worried looks. "Mom. Rissa. I'm fine. This is a lot of exertion, and my body's not used to it. That's all. I'm just a little tired. This was exactly what I needed, though, thank you," he breathed. Looking around, his eyebrows furrowed and he mused aloud, "Why are the Christmukkah decorations still up?"

"Because Christmukkah isn't over yet." Summer announced, coming to sit on the table beside his chair. "And you know how I feel about Christmukkah, Ryan."

"Protect at all costs," Ryan stated, eyes twinkling to show he was teasing her.

Summer glared. "Watch it, Chino. Remember, rage blackouts."

Marissa smiled. "You got sick before we opened all of the presents. You feel up to it? Or do you want to rest first?"

"I can handle it." Ryan said, with a smile at his worried girlfriend. "Just point me where."

"You're on the couch in the den, young man," Kirsten announced sternly.

Ryan groaned and glanced at Marissa, stating dryly, "Never get sick."

"Deal," she laughed, capturing his face between her hands and kissing him breathless.

Ryan let her help him to the couch before Christmukkah Part II began. About two presents in, Ryan noticed a conspicuous absence. "Where's Seth?"

"Avoiding you or Summer. I'm not really sure which," Anna remarked, snuggling back into Luke. Luke kissed her head and asked, "Which one is he more afraid of?"

"Probably Summer. She's the one with the rage blackouts," Ryan teased, dodging back as Summer moved to smack him.

They all laughed, pleased to be getting back to normal. Seth arrived home after all of the presents had been opened and Ryan's friends were filling him in on what he'd missed while he was in the hospital. "Dr Smith has a twenty-five page paper for us to do. He said to take your time but make sure you got it done," Marissa said, filling her boyfriend in on the essay their history professor had assigned them.

Ryan nodded, looking up as Seth appeared in the doorway. "I was wondering when you'd get here."

"I really didn't think you'd want to see me," Seth said, glancing between him and Summer.

Summer resolutely turned her back, snapping, "We don't."

"Sum," Ryan scolded.

Summer got up and approached Ryan, kissing his cheek. "I'll see ya, Ryan."

"Summer," he protested, as she scooped up her purse and left with not a look back. "She's a little upset at you."

"I deserve it. And you? Are you a little upset at me?"

"More than a little," Ryan admitted, his blue eyes cold. "But I'm not entirely blameless. Still, the less we see of each other the better off everybody will be."

Seth nodded, "Deal. Here. Merry Christmukkah," he said, handing a festively wrapped present to his mother before leaving the room.

Kirsten looked disapprovingly at her son as she handed Ryan the present and raced off after her youngest. Ryan looked down at the present, before unwrapping it quietly. Inside lay the complete Legion comic series, Ryan's favorite. Ryan's lips pressed together and he refolded the paper around the comics. "Thanks guys."

Luke nodded, herding the Strays and his girlfriend from the room, leaving Marissa behind. Marissa slipped under his head, letting him curl up against her. Her fingers slipped over his head, watching as he closed his eyes and fell asleep. She sat there for hours, before Sandy came into the room. Smiling, he whispered, "Wiped out, huh?"

"Since when is that anything new?" she whispered in return, watching as Sandy slipped his arms under Ryan's shoulders and knees.

Ryan stirred sleepily, resting his head on his step-father's shoulder as Sandy lifted the boy from the couch and moved down the hallway toward his room. Marissa followed, watching as Sandy tenderly laid him on the bed. "You got him from here?" he asked his son's girlfriend, watching as Marissa stepped forward to tug off Ryan's boots.

"I've got him from here," she affirmed, tugging the blankets gently from under his body.

Sandy nodded, kissing her temple, before leaving the room. Marissa continued undeterred, unbuttoning Ryan's over-shirt. Lifting his sleeping form up against her chest, she pushed the shirt over his shoulders and down his arms. Her cheek rested against his bald head as she tossed the shirt aside. She removed his belt as well, before pulling the blankets up and kissing his head. "I love you, Ryan Nichol-Cohen," she murmured, before getting up from the bed.

A hand closed firmly around her wrist and Marissa turned to see Ryan looking up at her with tired eyes. "Stay with me. Please?"

Marissa nodded, kissing his hand. "Let me change."

Ryan nodded, his eyes tracking his girlfriend as she slipped out of her miniskirt and blouse, pulling one of his t-shirts over her head. Climbing into the bed next to him, she snuggled under his arm, her head resting just above his heart. He kissed her head tiredly, before murmuring, "I love you, Marissa Cooper." Seconds later, he slipped back into unconsciousness.

Marissa smiled at his confession, her fingers trailing lazily over his chest before she fell asleep in her boyfriend's arms.


	18. Chapter 17

AN: Hey guys, I'm so sorry for neglecting you guys. It's been a pretty hectic couple of months. Two jobs, 60 hours a week. Friends, family, writing, total chaos. By the way, I'm ENGAGED!

Chapter 17: The Aftermath

It was almost four weeks before Ryan was deemed healthy enough to undergo the bone marrow transplant. A couple days after that, Ryan and Seth were put under anesthesia and the transplant took place. For Seth it was no problem, just a bump on the hip. But Ryan woke up more tired than he'd ever been since he'd gotten sick. Marissa was sitting in the chair next to him, her hand covering his where it lay on the bed. "Hey, you," she whispered, watching him look around the room. "How you feeling?"

"Tired," he confessed, eyes fluttering with the effort to stay awake.

"Nothing new, right?" she teased, kissing his palm tenderly.

"Right," he chuckled, squeezing her hand lightly. "Mom?"

"She's with the doctor. She'll be back soon."

Ryan nodded, closing his eyes. "Tell her I love her."

"I will," Marissa agreed, before Ryan's breathing evened out and he fell asleep again.

Kirsten came in minutes later. "Well?"

"He woke up, for a few minutes. He said to tell you he loves you. I think he's gonna be okay."

"Well, only time will tell," Kirsten said, leaning over the bed to press a kiss to the curve of her son's head.

It was less than 24 hours later than Dr Reynolds entered his patient's room and declared him cancer-free. Ryan only smiled and accepted his mother's gleeful hug. "That's so great baby! And just think. No more chemo."

Ryan laughed. "Now that's something to celebrate."

"You want to? Celebrate I mean? I can throw a party. You know I can."

Ryan looked up at his mom with a smile. "You know what, that actually sounds like a good idea."

Sandy groaned as Kirsten smiled. "Ryan, do you know what you've just done?"

"I know exactly what I've just done. Given us all a chance to unwind."

Sandy groaned again, muttering, "Not another Newport party!"

Ryan smiled and then laughed, the first real laugh he'd had in more than a year. Kirsten smiled at him and hugged him. But, before he could go home, Dr. Reynolds had some post-op orders. "I want you to rest. Your body has taken one hell of a beating. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get some rest. Take things slow. And I want you wear a surgical mask in public for the first weeks after you get home. Your immune system is shot after your surgery. We don't want you getting home and then spiking a fever and coming back. So keep contact with outside people to a minimum, don't come in contact with anyone who's sick, and try to stay in your house for awhile. All right?"

Ryan nodded, chuckling, "I'll do just about anything to get out of this hospital and go home."

Dr. Reynolds laughed. "I'll bet you would. All right. I want to see you back, in about three weeks. All right?"

Ryan nodded. "All right."

"Good. I'll send your mother in with your clothes so you can get dressed to go. I'll go fill out the paperwork and you should be in your own bed tonight."

Ryan grinned at his doctor at the news, laughing lightly when the older man ruffled his hair fondly. "I'm gonna miss ya, kid," Reynolds confided, before leaving Ryan with Kirsten. After everyone congratulated him and Ryan was on his way home, Kirsten rounded on her son. "You need to forgive him, Ryan."

Ryan stared out the passenger side window. "I know. But I can't. Not right now. I needed him and he promised that if I needed him, he'd be here."

Kirsten nodded, stroking his head. "I know. But he's hurting, just like you are. And neither of you are going to be okay unless you forgive him."

Ryan closed his eyes and nodded. "I know. I will. Just not today."

"Tomorrow then." Kirsten said, having trapped her son and they both knew it.

Ryan turned to face Kirsten with a smile. "Tomorrow."

Ryan got home and collapsed into bed, sleeping like the dead for nearly twelve hours. When he woke up, he felt stronger and more awake than he'd been since before he got sick. He reached over and grabbed the mask sitting on his nightstand, pulling it over his nose and mouth before climbing from his bed. Stretching wide over his head, he dressed in a pair of jeans, one of his wife-beaters and a button-down shirt. Locating his boots on the floor of his closet, he pulled those on as well, before leaving his room and joining the family in the kitchen. Kirsten saw him first and smiled. "Hey, you're awake."

"Yeah," he agreed, coming over to kiss her cheek.

"How do you feel?"

Ryan smiled, "Better. I'm home. I'm with my family and my friends. I'm cancer-free. Life doesn't get much better than this."

Kirsten wrapped him in a big hug. "So, when do you want this party?"

"Well, I can't have it for a few weeks. You have no idea what they could track in. As it is, it probably won't happen until Doc gives the okay."

"That's fine, Ryan. I just want you to be happy."

Ryan's eyes crinkled at the corners and Kirsten knew that behind the mask, her son was smiling. "I am happy, momma."

Kirsten smiled at her son, kissing the smooth skin of his crown. "Good."


	19. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: I'm BACK! Yay! Anyway, thanks to everyone who is still reading this. It's not done yet, people, so continue to be tuned in. Found my bridesmaids' dresses, thank heavens. So that's one less thing to stress about. Happy Christmas…er, Merry Hanukah…er, Happy New Years? I think I got those right. ;) Miss you guys so much! See you soon with the next chapter!

Chapter 18: Apologies

Nearly three weeks after Ryan came home, Doctor Reynolds gave Kirsten permission to throw Ryan a party. Kirsten went into a flurry of activity, trying to make this party the best party in Newport history. Ryan moved back into his old room next to Seth's and was there, working on his essay for Dr Smith's class when Seth appeared at the door. "Ryan?" he asked quietly, knocking on the door.

Ryan looked up, "Seth? What's up?"

"We need to talk. Or we're going to kill each other." Seth said, coming further into the room and shutting the door behind him.

"How about we take this to the pool house? Mom can't hear us screaming at each other there," Ryan agreed, setting his books aside.

Seth nodded, opening the door and leading the way through the house. Kirsten looked up from where she was sitting at the bar, eyes narrowing at the sight of them together. "All right, you two, what's going on?"

"Nothing, Mom." Ryan assured her, kissing her cheek, "Seth and I need to talk. That's all."

Kirsten nodded reservedly, watching the two leave the kitchen and head into the pool house. Seth moved to sit on the bed, while Ryan sprawled in a chair. "All right. Talk." Ryan said, gesturing for Seth to begin.

"I didn't leave because of you."

"Could have fooled me. You left your family behind the instant I left Newport with Theresa. You left Summer alone. She loved you and you left her. Mom was devastated when you left. After I came home, I moved into my new room. And late at night, when she thought I was asleep, I would hear her crying in your room. You're her son! And you ditched out on everyone who loves you, because you couldn't face a Newport the way it was before I came."

"Newport was hell for me!" Seth protested, angry.

"And Chino was hell for me!" Ryan screamed back, lunging from his chair. "You think I wanted to go back to Chino?"

"Well you left, didn't you?"

"I left because at the time I thought it was the right thing to do. And even if you don't want to do the right thing, you have to. The right thing to do, in your case, was stay here with the people who love you. Not run away because things were going to get hard."

Seth huffed and moved to the windows, staring out at the ocean. "I couldn't go back to the way it was. Without you, I thought I was going to lose everything."

"You don't think you did? You lost me. You lost Summer. You lost your parents. What is left? Luke hit you the second he saw you."

Seth grumbled, rubbing at his jaw where the jock's fist had connected. "And what about you? You didn't tell me you were sick. You didn't tell me you were my brother."

"You didn't give me an opportunity to." Ryan protested, throwing up his arms in frustration. "The only time you called, I was asleep. And when Mom wouldn't tell you what was wrong, you didn't call back. And yeah, I should have let Mom tell you. But I wanted to tell you. I never would have forgiven her if she had told you without my permission. You know that."

Seth turned back to his brother. "You still should have told me."

"I'm sorry. You should have come home when Mom asked you to, the first time." Ryan accused, before taking a deep breath and shoving his hands into his pockets. "I'm sorry I went back to Chino and left you behind. I thought I had to."

Seth nodded, watching his brother leave the pool house that had once been his. Ryan moved back into the kitchen, kissing Kirsten's cheek, before moving to the fridge for a glass of orange juice. Kirsten continued to browse her newspaper, pretending to be oblivious to her son. Ryan took a sip of his juice, smiling at her obvious attempt at nonchalance. "All right, Mom. Out with it."

"Well, what happened?" she demanded, her blue eyes meeting Ryan's own.

"Nothing. I said I was sorry. Whether he forgives me, that's entirely up to him."

"Did he apologize for staying away?"

"Not this time. But he has before."

"And? Did you forgive him?"

"Seth's my brother. I forgave him as soon as it happened. I don't act like it, I mean I'm supposed to make him grovel. But I forgave Seth a long time ago." Taking a long drink, Ryan pushed away from the counter. "I'll be in my room, working on that essay."

Kirsten nodded, the two exchanging kisses on the cheeks as Ryan moved from the room. Seth entered the room not more than five minutes after Ryan was gone. Kirsten pulled the same ploy she'd done with Ryan, though Seth seemed to be oblivious to the tactic. Glancing up at her youngest, Kirsten questioned, "Did you two talk?"

Seth just grunted, pulling a Sprite from the recesses of the fridge. Taking that as an affirmative, Kirsten asked, "What did you say?"

"He apologized."

"Did you?" she asked absently, flipping the page of her paper.

"No," Seth confessed, rooting around in the cabinets for something to eat.

Kirsten set the paper down and met her son's eyes curiously. "Don't you think you should?"

"Why should I apologize? I already have."

"Another apology never hurt anyone," Kirsten reminded him, before turning her attention to her newspaper again. "Whatever you decide to do, Seth, make sure you won't regret it later in life."

Seth nodded, kissing her cheek and going outside again. Kirsten sighed and sat back in her chair. Sandy came in just then, having recognized that sound. "What's wrong, love?"

"Do you think they'll ever go back to the way they were?"

"They both have a lot of baggage to toss aside, Ryan much more so than Seth. If they can forgive each other, they just might."

"Ryan told me he forgave Seth. But Seth hasn't said one way or another." Kirsten said, nibbling on one perfectly manicured fingernail.

"Let them work it out. There's nothing else we can do." Sandy advised, before asking fretfully, "How's the party coming along?"

"It's going to be Ryan's 18th birthday party I've decided, as well as a no-more-chemo party." Kirsten announced, kissing her husband languidly.

"How many people are you inviting?"

"All of Ryan's friends. And half of the Newport social scene."

Sandy grimaced, before shrugging. "Happy Birthday to Ryan."

Kirsten laughed happily, throwing her arms around her husband's neck. "I was thinking about letting Marissa take Ryan out tonight. And shipping Seth off to my dad."

"Hm," Sandy mused, his arms looping around her waist. "Sounds… promising."

"We haven't had any time to ourselves since Ryan got sick. And I'm going to make it up to you."

"You're not going to cook, are you?"

Kirsten drew back sharply, her hand smacking Sandy's shoulder lightly. "Oh thanks!"

Sandy smiled, pulling her relentlessly to him for a deep kiss. "I love you."

Kirsten smiled back, kissing his sweetly. "And I love you."

Ryan smiled from the entryway to the kitchen as his parents found themselves totally wrapped up in each other. Turning soundlessly, he escaped back to his own room and shut the door.


	20. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

Chapter 19: The Party

Summer and Marissa showed up on the day of Ryan's party nearly an hour early, Anna meeting them giggling at the door. "We're allowed to use Ryan's room. Luke has sequestered himself and Ryan in the pool house."

Marissa grinned, tightening her grip on her garment bag. "Well, ladies, let's get ready to go. It's time to introduce Ryan Atwood to Newport as Ryan Nichol-Cohen, son of Kirsten and Sandy Cohen."

The other two girls grinned, the three girls dashing up the stairs at breakneck speed. As they dressed, the three couldn't resist exchanging gossip. "So, has Ryan forgiven Seth yet?" Anna asked Marissa, as she fastened the zipper of her dress.

"Yes. He forgave him as soon as Seth apologized, even if he didn't admit it. But he told Kirsten he did. And he told me he did. So, I believe him."

"Cohen nearly got him killed," Summer reminded them both, adjusting the lie of her skirt.

"I know. But Ryan wasn't completely blameless. Ryan let his pride get in the way of letting anyone else tell Seth what was going on. I don't blame anyone, Summer, I'm just happy Seth came home in time to save my boyfriend's life."

Anna smiled, nodding emphatically. "Amen to that."

Summer grumbled lightly under her breath. Sighing, she mused, "Well, if Ryan can forgive him, I guess I can too. But I'm not going to let him know that just yet. He has to apologize, sincerely, first."

"No one would expect anything less. Have you talked to him lately?"

"Cohen? No!" Summer said, shaking her head firmly. "He hasn't even tried."

"You do realize that he's probably afraid you're going to castrate him or something, right?" Anna reminded her, as Marissa added, "Rage blackouts?"

"Cohen's just a wimp."

Marissa laughed, nodding. "No arguments there."

The three laughed together happily, before continuing to dress for the party. Half an hour later, there was a knock at the door and a laughing Marissa came to the door. Ryan stood there, hands shoved into the pockets of his pants. Marissa stared, her eyes running up and down his form. Though he still had a lot of weight to gain back, her boyfriend was without a doubt the most handsome man she'd ever seen. Black slacks ran the length of his legs, while a dark blue button-down hugged to his chest. His tie hung in a loose knot around his neck, revealing a small patch of his throat. An all black baseball hat hid his baldness well, as well as hiding the scar left by the tube in the back of his head. "You look very attractive," Marissa told him breathlessly, looking up into eyes like sapphires.

Ryan's eyes smiled at her, though his face stayed schooled in passive lines. "With all due respect, Miss Cooper, you don't look half bad yourself."

Marissa blushed, ducking her head. Ryan couldn't resist letting his eyes scan her body. She wore a strapless silver dress, heavily embroidered, which belled out at the bottom. Black ribbon wrapped around the empire waist and trimmed the hem as well, the black crinoline petticoat peeking out from beneath the silver brocade. Black flats seemed to add to the fun, festive air around her. Her hair fell in loose curls down her back, and her jewelry was simple, a thin chain with a diamond-encrusted star pendant and simple silver hoops. Her fingers were bare, though Ryan hoped they wouldn't be by the end of the evening, fingering the velvet box in his pocket. "Can I borrow you?"

Marissa nodded, letting him take her hand and lead her from the room. Looking back over her shoulder, she commented, "I'll be right back."

Anna and Summer giggled girlishly, rushing to the door to watch Ryan lead her away. Ryan led Marissa from the house and into the pool house. He pulled the blinds and locked the door, before turning to face her. She was watching him curiously, obviously confused as to what he was planning. "I thought Luke was supposed to be in here?"

"Luke and I got finished awhile ago, and Luke went to help my mother with something."

Marissa nodded, watching as he shifted his weight nervously, his hand still fiddling with something in his pocket. "Ryan, just get it out. You're obviously nervous. What's wrong?"

Ryan reached out, taking both of her arms and sitting her down onto the bed, before dropping to one knee in front of her. Marissa's eyes widened and she knew immediately what was happening. She couldn't have spoken if she wanted to as Ryan met her eyes. "Rissa, you have been here this whole time. You've seen my sicker than I ever would have allowed anyone else to see. You've held me while I threw up, you've taken care of me when I was fevered, you've loved me no matter what. And I wouldn't be honest with myself if I didn't tell that I have loved you more with every second than the second that came before." Reaching into his pocket again, he pulled out the box and snapped it open, showing her the glittering contents. "Will you marry me, Marissa Ann Cooper? Be my wife?"

Marissa's eyes were staring at the beautiful diamond solitaire there, before looking up into his eyes. Seeing the love he had for her, she nodded, stuttering, "Yes." Regaining her composure, she laughed happily, saying again, "Yes, Ryan. Yes, I will marry you."

Ryan leaned forward, kissing her long and passionately. When they drew apart, Ryan extracted the ring from the box and slipped it onto her left ring finger. Pulling her into his arms again, they kissed again. "Oh and before I forget," Ryan muttered, pulling away from the kiss, before looking into her eyes with a mischievous grin, "I'll re-grow my hair before our wedding. I promise."

Marissa growled at him, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him again, throwing all thoughts of hair, marriage and a party from his mind. All he could think was how much he loved the woman before him. And what he would do to make her happy.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it.

AN: Sorry guys for the long wait. It's been a long couple of months. My boyfriend injured himself pretty badly in December, and so between helping him heal, I've also been going to school. However, the end is at hand. Let me know what you think and whether or not you'd like an epilogue. Thanks to everyone who has been so patient with this story.

Chapter 20

When the newly engaged couple entered the party, it soon became apparent to everyone what had happened. Kirsten's sharp eyes picked out the ring first, and she smiled happily, moving forward in order to be the first to congratulate them. Ryan smiled to see her coming, tightening his grip on his fiancée's hand, before releasing her. "I'm so happy for you both!" Kirsten cried, her heart wide open as she took first Marissa and then her son into her arms.

Marissa blushed as her two best friends -Summer and Anna- caught sight of the ring and rushed over to squeal over it and her fiancé. "Congratulations!" Summer laughed, the two age-old friends squealing as the realization that Marissa was engaged finally set in.

Meanwhile, Kirsten still had one hand linked in her son's elbow, as they watched the three girls celebrate. Ryan smiled as he watched Marissa break free from their embraces for a moment to look for him. "I love you," he mouthed to her, waving off her concern. "Enjoy yourself."

Marissa nodded and blew him a kiss, before turning back to her friends. Kirsten glanced at her son, seeing his complete contentedness. "Are you happy, baby?"

Ryan smiled up at his mother. "The happiest."

Kirsten chuckled, one hand cupping his cheek as she bent to kiss his cheek. "Good. Now then . . . this is your birthday party. Enjoy it, okay?"

"You got it," he agreed, hugging his mother tightly, before moving to join his friends.

"Hey baby?"

"Yeah, Mom?"

Smiling at him through the tears in her eyes, she spoke, "I love you, so much."

"I love you too, Mom," he confessed, before getting swept away by his friends.

Later that night, the moon found Ryan surrounded by the Strays, Luke, Anna, Summer and Marissa, the love of his life. He and Ben were talking and laughing, and it seemed as though they had the world at their fingertips. Alone among the group, Summer caught sight of Seth standing off to himself. Marissa glanced between her best friend and her fiancé's brother, from her place between Ryan's knees. "Sum, just go talk to him. Get angry, do some yelling, and get over this."

"It won't be the same as it was."

"Nothing will ever be the same as it was," Ryan reminded his "little sister" but at least we can start to move past this. "I've forgiven him, Summer. At least you can do the same."

Summer took a deep breath and nodded. "All right. Here I go."

Getting up, she moved toward the teenager standing alone. "Can we talk?" she asked quietly, her eyes sad and distrusting.

Seth nodded, gesturing for her to precede him from the patio. Summer led him into the house and down the hallway to Ryan's room, the only place she knew they wouldn't be disturbed. Standing with her back to him for a long moment, she fought to gather her arsenal. At the sound of the door closing, she rounded on him. "I can't believe how selfish and cruel you were, Seth Cohen. I never would have thought it of you."

Seth stared at her for a long moment, his mouth hanging open in shock at the sudden attack. Finally gathering his wits, he burst out, "I said I was sorry."

"That doesn't automatically mean you've been forgiven, Seth! And you've only apologized to Ryan, who would have forgiven you even if you hadn't asked him to. He loves you that much; you're his brother. But what have you said to me, lately, huh? You haven't said a damn thing to me since you got home."

Seth burst in then, interrupting her furious tirade. "Excuse me, but you haven't let me get a word in since I got home. You're pretty damn intimidating when you're steamed, Summer Roberts, in case you didn't know."

Summer tossed a strand of raven hair over her shoulder. "That's beside the point, Seth. Grow some balls, for God's sake! I was your girlfriend! You owed me an apology, just as much as you owed your brother an apology. You just left me, without a word to let me know where you were going or even if you were coming back! The only reason I didn't move on is because I'm completely and 100 percent in love with you, you jackass! I couldn't do!"

Seth stared at her. "You're in love with me?" he asked, his voice small and curious.

Summer narrowed her eyes at him. "You make that sound like it's a surprise. Of course I'm in love with you, you idiot! Why else would I have been so steamed!?"

Suddenly moving, Summer was caught off guard as Seth wrapped one warm hand behind her neck and pulled her to him for a long kiss. She lost herself in it for as long as it lasted, noticeably panting as they pulled apart. Staring up at him with limpid eyes, she murmured, "This does not mean that I forgive you. You're going to have to work for it."

"No?" he questioned, his voice equally quiet. "Then allow me to work on that a bit harder."

This time when their lips met, Summer threw herself into it, measure for measure. When they arrived back with their friends, Ryan smiled to see their fingers interlocked together and her body pressed into the curve of his. "Everything go okay?" he inquired lightly.

"He's not forgiven yet, but he's working on it," Summer announced imperiously, her dark eyes daring Ryan to say anything else.

Ryan smirked, his lips firmly pressed together. Marissa, of course, had no such qualms. "Working on it, huh? How hard?"

Summer squawked and dipped her hand into the pool, splashing her best friend playfully. Pretty soon, all of them were either in the pool or so drenched it looked like they had been, regardless of their formal attire.

Kirsten and Sandy stood in the kitchen, watching them from the window. "He looks so happy," Kirsten murmured to her husband, resting her head back against his chest.

"Who? Ryan?"

"All of them. Do you think everything's okay now?"

"They've got some more things to work through, but for the most part I think they've made it through the trials we face."

Kirsten grin was so wide it could have split her face in two. "Thank God."

The End


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